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Happily Even After: 5 Tools to Heal Your Marriage, by Dannah GreshSample

Happily Even After: 5 Tools to Heal Your Marriage, by Dannah Gresh

DAY 1 OF 6

A note before we begin:

These devos are for the woman who believes she is safe and hopes to rebuild trust and intimacy in her marriage after her husband has sinned. A key component of restoration is humble, authentic repentance and brokenness in your husband. You are not safe in your relationship if you are experiencing sexual, physical, or verbal abuse or repeated trauma from flagrant sin for which your husband is not repentant. If that’s you, call someone who can help you get into a safe place.

Day 1: Can you live happily even after?

Marriage sure can bring a lot of joy.

And heartache.

You may be wondering if you can be happy even after the trauma…the betrayal…the porn…the lies. I’m here to tell you that the answer is an unequivocal yes because Jesus is a redeemer. That means He doesn’t just fix what’s broken, He makes it new.

But you will have to face the truth. Does that terrify you? Satan likes to lie to us, telling us that the truth will be too devastating. But truth, though not always pain-free, is never destructive. It always sets us free.

Here’s what your Redeemer once said: “If you abide in my word, you are truly my disciples, and you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.” (John 8:31–32)

Of course, the kind of truth I want you to know is not a set of facts, though the details do matter and will be part of your journey. The truth that will set you free is a person. Jesus said, “I am the way, and the truth, and the life” (John 14:6). True freedom is found in a living, loving relationship with Him. As you abide in the words of the Bible, you’ll come to know the truth more deeply than ever before and experience a whole new level of freedom.

You might be saying, “Dannah, I have already been set free by Christ. But something didn’t work, or I would not be sitting here in absolute misery.” Ah, did you forget the part about the epic battle between good and evil? The moment you discovered the freedom of Jesus Christ, Satan put you in his crosshairs. In this case, your marriage is the target. He wants to see if he can steal what’s already yours.

Tell him no!

Plant your feet firmly. You need not let yourself be caught again in the shackles of spiritual bondage (Galatians 5:1).

Remind the devil of the words of Jesus Christ: “If the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed” (John 8:36).

That’s not to say that this journey we are about to embark upon together will be easy. It won’t be. I know you’re probably sitting there downhearted, angry, frustrated, and disappointed with your husband. You could have hard questions about your own culpability in your circumstances. You may also feel defensive and distracted from the work God wants to do in your own heart because people all around you have opinions, and you don’t know what to do with them.

Been there, done that.

When my marriage was in need of God’s redemption, I discovered that He’d already provided the tools I needed to participate in His work in my marriage. There are ancient spiritual disciplines and truths that every believer can employ. I just needed to learn how to apply them to my broken heart and marriage. Over the next few days, we’ll explore them and begin to empower you for this hard task at hand.

Pray God’s Word: Lord, I need to experience your redemption and freedom. Help me to abide in your Word so I can know the truth and experience freedom. In Jesus’ name, amen.

Day 2