Healthy Practices Of Ministry CouplesSample

Let’s Get Busy
By Justin and Trisha Davis of CrossPoint.tv

There aren’t many topics that cause more arguments in a marriage than sex. Growing up, most of us weren’t given permission to experience God’s vision of sex. If we are honest, we didn’t grow up thinking God had a vision for sex.

Most couples that struggle in the area of sexual intimacy don’t just struggle with the physical aspect of sex. That is how it appears to one another, but that isn’t the whole story. Most couples, that are on different pages in the area of sexual intimacy, have not developed intimacy with one another either emotionally, spiritually, or both. The physical aspect to your marriage is an overflow of the emotional and spiritual intimacy you are experiencing as a couple.

Paul knew one thing to be true: Sexual drives are strong. But he says that the marriage bed is stronger. He says this in 1 Corinthians "the marriage bed must be a place of mutuality—the husband seeking to satisfy his wife, the wife seeking to satisfy her husband." It goes beyond the world’s definition of “sex” and gives a beautiful definition of what extraordinary physical intimacy looks like.

Although physical intimacy is not always mutually desired, when it is mutually offered it goes beyond the obvious physical pleasure and becomes a sacred sharing of being fully known physically, emotionally and spiritually. Pornography, lust and masturbation may meet one of these needs for a short period of time but always come back void of fully satisfying what physical intimacy was created for.

Wives, isn’t it comforting to know that sex is so much more than just a physical act used to satisfy our husbands? Husbands, isn’t it equally affirming that your strong desire to be intimate with your wife goes beyond just the physical? Sex is something to look forward to, not something that is dirty, wrong or sinful. It is a gift that God gives to a husband and wife when they mutually and sacrificially give their bodies to one another in order to be fully known.

Becoming fully known physically will require you to choose a path that may not be easy but it’s always worth it! It will require prayer, patience and grace.

1. What is the biggest hurdle you have in the area of sexual intimacy?

2. Do you feel like sexual intimacy should be mutually offered when not mutually desired?