Love After Marriage- Emotional IntimacySample

Day 5: It’s Not Only Who We Are, but Also What We Do:

The final step in cultivating intimacy is learning to live life in such a way that we feel good about ourselves before God. If we feel guilty about something we are doing, we won’t want to let someone else into our private internal life. Shame wants to keep things hidden. It’s common to hear statements like, “What matters is who you are; not what you do” or “God doesn’t care about your performance; He cares about your heart.” The truth is, it isn’t only your heart, nor is it only about what you do - it's BOTH! In Jeremiah 17:10 it says, “I, the Lord, search the heart, I test the mind, Even to give every man according to his ways, According to the fruit of his doings.” While God looks at our hearts to judge us justly; it is our actions that reveal what is in our hearts.

Let's take another look at John the Baptist. John the Baptist was God’s plan to prepare the way for people to see and receive the Kingdom of God in the person of Jesus Christ. When John admonished the Pharisees and the Sadducees who came to him for baptism, and by saying, “Bear fruit in keeping with repentance” (Matt. 3:7-8), John is telling all of us that empty words of confession are simply not enough; there must be more. There must be true repentance - a change of mind and behavior that joins hands with our confession. True repentance will always bring about real change and bear good, desirable fruit.

God desperately wants you to have the intimacy you desire. Can you see that God desires for us all to confess and repent of sin so that we will be free to invite our spouse into the innermost places of our heart? It is a necessary path to experiencing intimacy with him and with each other.

Ponder & Pray: Father, I pray for the grace needed to trust you and Your ways. I pray for humility to confess to You, and my spouse, any area of darkness ruling over me. I pray for the grace to go beyond just a remorseful confession and into a heartfelt commitment to continually turn to You, to let You bring lasting changes into my life. I pray this in the name of Jesus! Amen.

Activation: Discuss what patterns, habits or behaviors in your life make you happy with yourself and how you will seek God’s help to change.

This plan was provided by Barry and Lori Byrne, founders of Nothing Hidden Ministries. For more information about Nothing Hidden Ministries or attending a Love After Marriage workshop or, if you are single, a Single Life Workshop, please visit: https://nothinghidden.com/itinerary/

Barry & Lori have been married since 1979 and have raised four sons. Barry is a licensed Marriage Therapist with 38 years of experience. Nothing Hidden Ministries was founded in 2008 by Barry and Lori Byrne who have helped thousands of marriages, singles and families excel at connecting and building intimate relationships with God and with others.