Dating and the Single ParentSample

Pursue God’s Blessings

Every bride wants her father to give her away with his blessing. Christian couples also want God’s “blessing.” Therefore, it is important to seek God’s will for your life as it relates to marriage. The high calling of Scripture for divorced persons is to reconcile their original marriages if at all possible.

God created marriage in part to reflect the oneness of the Trinity and be a testimony to the world of selfless love. When a marriage dissolves, unity is broken and the testimony lost. But how much more is God glorified when a divorced couple reconciles their marriage and their family!

Now, having said that restoration of a separated or dissolved marriage is near to the heart of God, I want to acknowledge that this won’t be likely in many situations and wouldn’t be prudent in others. For example, returning to an unbelieving partner or restoring an abusive marriage would not bring glory to God unless there was radical repentance. The fundamental nature of such a marriage would have to be drastically different in order for a reconciliation to reflect God’s purposes in marriage. (Please note that many abusive partners will try to manipulate a spouse into coming back with spiritual guilt, blaming the victim for leaving the marriage, when in reality, it was the abusive partner who “left” the marriage by breaking their vows to love, honor, and cherish long before the divorce.) In addition, if your ex has remarried already, reconciliation is not possible (in fact, Scripture teaches against it, see Deuteronomy 24:1–4). The point is this: Don’t move on to another marital partner without first giving serious consideration to the calling of reconciliation. Instead, explore with a trusted spiritual advisor, pastor, or ministry the choices or actions you may have available to you as it relates to your former spouse and what the Bible teaches about this matter.

You need to do your own study of divorce and remarriage in Scripture, but you also need to walk out your choices in community with others and under the guidance of your local church. If you are part of a local church, you have submitted yourself to their leadership and should seriously consider their teaching about divorce and remarriage.

Adapted from the book Dating and the Single Parent by Ron L. Deal. Used with permission. All rights reserved.

TRY THIS

• Based on today’s Scripture verse, do you need to give consideration to reconciling a first marriage? If so, who could you speak with that would help guide this process?
• If you haven’t already, complete the 7-day reading plan Dating with Purpose also available on YouVersion. It will complement the material in this plan.

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