Challenges of a Millennial Marriageনমুনা

What Does Purity in Marriage Look Like?

Devotional Content:

I don’t hear the word purity used very often, especially when it comes to marriage. We can use it a lot before marriage as we talk about premarital sex. We ask, “Do we keep our relationship pure before marriage or not?” Yet, in marriage, the word has lost its impact.

I think purity is just as important—if not more important—in marriage than before, and I think culture backs me up. You can search for the statistics, but the consensus is that around 50 percent of women and 70 percent of men will at some point cheat on their spouse. Every time I see those figures it saddens me. There are a lot of reasons given for infidelity, but easy accessibility through technology is a big one. There are also more women in the workplace, and the stigma of having an affair does not seem to have the effect it once did. Yet, as a counselor, one of the deepest hurts I see comes from infidelity.

Let’s define purity in marriage. Simply put, purity means I keep my eyes only on my spouse. I don’t look lustfully at someone of the opposite sex. I don’t flirt. I don’t have meals alone with someone of the opposite sex. I don’t travel for business alone with someone of the opposite sex. I don’t look at porn. I keep my sexual thoughts on my spouse only. As a couple, we work on our sexual relationship. We talk about what we like and don’t like. We make sex a priority and seek to meet each other’s needs. We are unselfish. We pray every day that our sexual desire would be for our spouse alone. In sports, we say that a good offense is the best defense. That is definitely true in sex. The better your sex life is in marriage, the less attractive something or someone else will be.

A couple of final thoughts. You will be tempted, but temptation is not a sin. Don’t forget that Jesus was tempted. Every person is vulnerable. Anytime you think you are not, you take the first step toward a fall. You have the power of the Creator of everything in you. He wants so much for you to stay pure in your marriage, and He will do anything and everything you allow Him to do to keep your marriage pure. Just let Him in!

Today’s Challenge:

Share with each other your areas of vulnerability as related to purity. Decide what steps you will take to protect the purity of your marriage. If you need outside counsel, get it. Your marriage may depend on it.

Going Deeper:

Take a time-out to spend time looking honestly at your relationship. Pray and ask God to help you see if there are any red flags in your relationship. Remember that red flags have to be dealt with and that ending a relationship now is easier, and less hurtful, than a marriage ending in divorce.

Resource: Date Night Idea Printable

Grow a more healthy marriage through quality date time with your spouse! Coming up with great date plans can be hard, but it doesn’t have to be! Take the pressure off with our list of connecting date ideas!

We pray you and your spouse can have some fun without the stress of deciding what to do for date night.