Living Changed: When Your Birth Story Didn’t Go As Expectedনমুনা

God is in Control

Since you’re reading these words, chances are good that, like me, you experienced a traumatic birth. You may not call it that, but I’m sure we can both agree on one thing: the expectations we had for our birth didn’t match our reality.

I had a relatively healthy pregnancy. My husband and I enjoyed all the typical first-time parent things like creating a registry, taking weekly bump pictures, and decorating the nursery. Everything was perfect—until it wasn’t.

After some concerning symptoms, my husband drove me to the hospital to get checked out. I assumed it would be a routine checkup and we’d be sent home. Instead, after running some tests, my nurse looked at me and said, “You are not leaving this hospital until you have your baby.” I was only 32 weeks pregnant.

My thoughts spiraled. “Why is this happening? What is wrong with me? Will our baby be okay? Will I be okay? What did I do wrong?”

Maybe your story is like mine and everything was fine until one moment that changed everything, or maybe your doctors were able to warn you that you might experience complications with your pregnancy or delivery. Whatever your birth story looked like, I pray you remember this truth: In the moments where we are thrown into chaos and our lives feel out of control, our God has complete control.

Jesus reminds us of this in the book of John. He says, “I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.”

In times of great trouble, unforeseen trials, and excruciating pain, we have a choice. We can look inside ourselves for strength, or we can choose to turn to our all-powerful, all-knowing, all-loving Father. On our own, we will consistently fall short, but when we are weak, Christ carries our burdens and makes us strong.

Your birth experience matters to God. Give yourself permission to acknowledge the unmet expectations and the things that didn’t go the way you wanted them to go. You don’t need to belittle what you went through just because it doesn’t seem as bad as someone else’s story. There’s enough of God’s healing grace to cover all of us. His love has no limits.

God sees your pain. He is sitting with you in the middle of it. He hears the cries deep in your heart, even the ones you can’t even put into words. Your fears, worries, and heartache. The secret thoughts that you don’t want anyone to know—you can bring it all to God because nothing will scare Him away. He wants to help you. He is waiting patiently for you. Will you let Him in?

God, I thank You that you see me and that You know the pain in my heart. I’m hurting, and confused. I need help and healing that only You can bring. I may not know where to start, but I invite You into my pain. Please help me to lean on You in my moments of desperation. Give me the strength to get through this. In Jesus’ name. Amen.