Don't Mom Aloneনমুনা

Day Seven

When You Wonder How You Will Ever Be a “Good Mom”

Scripture: Exodus 34:6; Romans 5:20-21; Hebrews 4:16

In my fifteen years of being a mom, I’ve read countless books, sought the counsel of mentors, swapped ideas with mom friends, pinned creative snack ideas, listened to podcasts, attended mom conferences, and interviewed seven years’ worth of weekly guests on my podcast, but I still wouldn’t give myself the “good mom” title. Not to mention, I haven’t found a step-by-step guide for success. 

Many days have ended with a tear-filled, self-deprecating monologue (usually in the kitchen). It never went well when my husband encouraged me to “care a little less” or “stop trying so hard.” 

One night I vividly remember him saying, “Is there any mom who thinks she’s doing a good job?” 

Stop traffic. Is there? 

I know the mistakes are easy for me to see. But it’s harder for me to remember that where sin is, grace is even bigger (Romans 5:20). 

God isn’t looking down with a magnifying glass to catch us when we mess up. Instead, He’s inviting us to remember how we can embrace the good news of His daily, abundant grace. Mistakes give us an opportunity to learn, to forgive, and to repair. 

What a privilege to be challenged so beyond my ability as a mom that I must rely on our great God. Because if I could be a great mom on my own, then I wouldn’t need God. I would miss out on working with Him to grow these children into adults—to cheerlead them into the kingdom. 

In The Pursuit of God, A. W. Tozer writes, “Not perfection, but holy intention made the difference.” Your intention to honor God in mothering matters. Your desire to please Him and treat Him special in your home is noticed by our Holy God. He sees you trying. He sees me trying. And He pours grace over us. 

As I accept that truth, I’m able to present my imperfect, well-intentioned self to you. I can show up to my community as I am. Not polished and filtered, fearful of judgment, but surrendered to God’s redeeming work and His surrounding, amazing grace. 

Make a list of what you consider to be part of a “good mom” formula. Look at your “good mom” list and next to each item write out your heart’s intention. What does it show you care about? How does it feel to acknowledge your intention instead of your imperfection?