Rise Of The Truth Teller By Ashley Abercrombieনমুনা

Day Three

Breaking the Vows of Unforgiveness

Scripture: 1 Timothy 1:15–17

Unless we are healthy and whole, how can we ever rise as truth tellers? We can’t, because we’ll only be able to see ourselves, others, and the world through the lens of our pain and brokenness. When we don’t forgive, someone else is controlling our life, even if they’ve been out of our life for years. 

When we really think about it, isn’t hatred at the heart of unforgiveness? If I hunker down and look myself in the eye, I begin to realize that not forgiving and hating others has led me to make some serious vows. 

I hate you for raping me, and I will never be vulnerable when intimate again. 

I hate you for verbally abusing me, and I will hate myself, my thighs, and my voice from now on. 

I hate you for hoarding all the opportunities at work, so I will overwork to prove myself to our boss, hoping he will give me opportunities too. 

I hate that you never listen to me, so I will fight to be heard, no matter how contentiously. 

I hate that you hurt me, so I will suffer in silence and remove my contribution from this project, this team, this church, because you don’t see my value and it’s not (you’re not) worth the fight. 

Our vows, spoken and unspoken, can cause us to forfeit our freedom, and that includes the potential fulfillment of a dream, friendships and relationships, career opportunities, and more. 

It must be said that there is room for the process, here. But struggling to forgive and denying that we need to are two different things. One is a pathway to freedom, the other, to bondage and chains. 

I love what Paul says in 1 Timothy 1:15–17. I am the worst of them all. And I am. But God had grace on me. Remembering this, and knowing that I have been and am still forgiven, helps me return to love, return to forgiveness. Because how can I, chief sinner, withhold what I have been given so freely? Forgiveness makes us whole, because forgiveness sets us free. The gap between who we are and who we pretend to be starts closing with forgiveness, because we return to our innocence, our joy, our true self. 

Forgiveness frees us to be truth tellers. 

What vows have you made because of the hurts in your past? How have they affected your pursuit of your purpose?