Smart Guys 30
30
Wat Agur Tell
1Dis, da tings Jakeh boy Agur tell. He get one real importan message fo tell fo God. Dis wat da guy tell to Itiel, an to Ukal too:
2Cuz I know I one dumb buggah, an mo like one animal den one guy.
I no undastan wat peopo suppose to undastan.
3I neva learn how fo know wat fo do erytime,
An da stuff dat da God Dat Stay Good An Spesho know, I donno.
4You know, no mo nobody but God
Can go up inside da sky,
Den come back down hea.
No mo nobody
Can hold da wind inside his two hand
Fo make um blow o no blow.
No mo nobody
Can wrap his coat aroun da ocean fo carry um.
No mo nobody
Can make da whole world, even da mos far places.
If you know somebody dat can do all dat,
Let me know who him an wat his name!
Let me know who his boy an wat his boy name!
5Eryting God tell,
You know az true
Wen you trus him fo take kea you.
He jalike one shield fo you no get hurt.
6No go tell, God tell someting
An he neva tell dat.
If you do dat,
God goin show dat you stay wrong,
An peopo goin find out, you one bulaia.
7Eh God! Get two tings I like aks you fo do fo me befo I mahke!
No tell me you no like do um.
8Firs, no let me do wase time kine stuff
O bulai odda peopo.
Nex, no let me come pooa so I no mo notting,
An no give me mo stuff den I need.
Jus make me feel good wit enuff food an tings fo wat I need.
9No good I get eryting I like get,
An den ack jalike I donno you, God,
An tell, “Who Da One In Charge?! He no mean notting fo me!”
An no good I come real pooa so I no mo notting,
An den I start fo steal stuffs from odda peopo,
An give you, my God, one bad rep.
Wat Odda Smart Guys Tell
10No talk bad to one boss guy bout his worka guy.
Cuz da worka guy goin tell God, an God goin hurt you,
An punish you lidat.
11Get da kine peopo
Dat tell God fo hurt dea faddah
An no tell God fo do good tings fo dea muddah.
12Dey da kine peopo
Dat tink no mo notting wrong wit dem.
An inside, dey pilau.
Dey no let nobody make um come clean inside.
13Dey da kine peopo
Dat ack jalike dey mo betta den erybody.
Az why wen dey look at you, dey ack jalike you notting.
14An dat kine peopo,
Dey like wipe out da peopo dat no mo powa
From all ova da world.
Dey like wipe out da peopo dat need help
So dey no need help um an dey go way.
Dey jalike one wild animal
Dat get sharp teets, jalike one sword o knife!
15Da leech, da kine dat suck yoa blood, get two girls,
Dea names, “Suck!” an “Suck!”
An get three odda tings
Dat keep sucking an not enuff yet fo dem:
16Da Mahke Peopo Place,
Da kine wahine dat no can get hapai,
Da kine groun dat erytime need watta.
An numba four, da kine dat no goin tell, “Nuff awready!”:
Az da fire dat erytime need mo wood.
17Da kine guys dat make fun a dea faddah
An tink dey big, dey no need do wat dea muddah tell um fo do,
Da crow birds dat live inside da valley
Goin poke out dea eye,
An da scavenja birds goin eat dea mahke body.
18Get three ting dat too much fo me, I no can undastan:
19How da eagle can go inside da sky?
How da snake can go on top one big rock?
How da big boat can go inside da middo a da deep ocean?
An da numba four ting dat I no can undastan, cuz I donno:
How one guy make um fo one young wahine like um?!
Dis too, too much fo me fo undastan!
20An I no undastan dis too:
How one wahine can fool aroun behind her husban back,
Den jus go bafe fo come clean,
An she tink, “Eh, I neva do notting wrong!”
21Get three tings dat hard fo peopo handle, all ova da world:
22Wen one slave come dea king,
Wen one stupid guy get real plenny fo eat an drink,
23Wen one ol wahine dat erybody no like find one husban,
An numba four, dat nobody in da world can handle,
Wen one slave wahine take ova da house from da lady she work fo!
24Get four ting on top da groun dat stay real small,
But dey real akamai:
25Da ants, dey not real strong,
But summa time,
Dey make shua dey get plenny food
Fo las dem da whole year.
26Da rock hyrax, dey no stay strong too,
But dey know how fo make dea house
Inside da cracks in da big cliffs, fo hide.
27Da locust, da ones dey look jalike grasshoppa,
Dey no mo one king,
But dey know how fo move all togedda,
Jalike dey one army.
28Da gecko, you can catch um wit yoa hand,
But dey even live wea da king live.
29Get three ting, wen you spock um,
You tink, “Nice, how dey move!”
30Da lion, from all da animals,
He da mos strong one,
An he no turn aroun an run away from nobody.
31Da roosta dat hold up his head wen he walk,
Da billy goat dat lead da odda sheeps an goats.
An numba four, da one dat move real nice kine too,
One king marching wit his army guys.
32If you do stupid kine stuff
An ack jalike you importan,
O if you tink real hard bout how fo do someting bad,
You betta stop it right now!
33You put milk in one bag an put presha,
You get sof cheese.
You squeeze yoa nose an put presha,
You get one bleed nose.
You put presha on one guy an make um mad,
You get one fight!
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Smart Guys 30: HPB
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