Healing Your Marriage When Trust Is Brokenናሙና

I would love to be able to give an absolute answer when people ask me if they should stay in their broken marriages. A simple yes or no would make your decision so much easier, but it just doesn't work that way. You are the one who has to live with your choice. 

I remember this season in my own life. The question began to plague me almost immediately after Chris’ confession. Within a very short time, I pictured myself as a single mom who would be headed back to work while trying to figure out how to share the parenting with my unfaithful husband. 

In the midst of my panic, I felt like I had to decide my marriage’s fate. A dear friend, Kevin Penry, said, “You don’t have to make that decision today.” With his simple, yet wise counsel, the burden of my future had been lifted off my back, at least temporarily.  The truth was, I didn’t have to know that day or the next week or even the next month. There was no wisdom in deciding the rest of my life within days of the biggest, most devastating piece of news I’ve ever received. 

Matthew 5 tells us that marital unfaithfulness is grounds for divorce. Clearly, this is a serious issue. But just because we can, doesn't mean we should. I believe in doing everything we possibly can to restore a broken or dead marriage. Many will say that is an impossible feat. And for some situations, it just might be. 

Maybe you feel like you have to decide the future of your marriage today. You feel like if you don’t do something “right now” that you are just wasting more time in a marriage that has no hope. Maybe you don’t want to be fooled again. I get it. I felt this way, too.

If you ever find yourself in shoes that are either pointed for the door to walk away or pointed toward your spouse to stay, pray for God to tell you what to do. He will. I don’t know what the answer will be, but God most certainly does. 

Do you feel yourself panicking over the choice to leave or stay in your marriage? Spend some time today in God’s Word asking Him to guide and direct you with His Word. Keep asking Him daily until He shows you a Word to stand on.