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Trying Again Part II : After Miscarriage & Pregnancy LossSample

Trying Again Part II : After Miscarriage & Pregnancy Loss

DAY 3 OF 5

Communication Plan

As my husband and I started to try for children, I noticed since I had lost before, I didn't enjoy telling my spouse when I had appointments such as getting bloodwork done or checking for ovulation. He would ask me for updates quite frequently and I found myself somewhat anxious about getting results that would be disappointing. It's different when you only know about something but harder when someone else has to know and you experience the disappointment together; but in different ways. It can cause contention between spouses for a couple of reasons:

1. Frustration about how infertility disappointments are handled.

2. Frustration when one spouse is quicker to move on and give cliché advice that feels insensitive.

3. Lack of empathy.

The key to being prepared in these moments is communication. Not just open and clear communication during disappointments but beforehand. You and your spouse should have a transparent conversation about how you want things handled in the process.

Reflection:

1. Would you prefer to bring up updates about fertility appointments when you are ready versus them asking?

2. Would you prefer to keep your fertility journey only between each other until you both are ready to share?

Talk to your spouse about a plan on how you all will handle these conversations and situations. Preparing now could prevent a confrontation later.

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About this Plan

Trying Again Part II : After Miscarriage & Pregnancy Loss

After I lost my son, I struggled with my relationship with God, but I didn't expect to struggle in my relationship with my spouse. When we decided to try again, feelings of anxiety, sadness, tiredness, and frustration affected our marriage. In part two of "Trying Again," we will take a short walk together on the journey of caring for ourselves and our marriage.

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