The Maker and Mental Health預覽

Day 1 — All The Emotions

Have you ever felt forgotten? Have you ever felt like anxious thoughts plague your mind all day long so you can’t even focus? Have you ever felt such deep sorrow that death felt more appealing than life?

You are not alone.

And if those words don’t carry enough weight (that’s okay if they don’t!) - take it from David, a man after God’s own heart. In Psalm 13:1, he says “How long, Lord? Will you forget me forever? How long will you hide your face from me?”

In the midst of deep sorrow, David pleads out to the Lord. He feels forgotten. He feels left behind. He feels forsaken.

Yet, we can learn from his deep honesty in the midst of this Psalm. While God feels far from Him, He still calls out to Him in hope. David is vulnerable, even with the person that he feels hurt by.

“Look on me and answer, Lord my God. Give light to my eyes, or I will sleep in death…” (Psalm 13:3)

There are 5 things that we can learn from David in this Psalm about regulating our own emotions and how they relate to God.

1. It’s okay to have really deep and dark feelings. David was no stranger to depression, fear, anxiety, or highs and lows. And yet, he was called a man after God’s own heart. And beyond him, our own Savior was no stranger to struggle. In fact, he told us that in this world we would have trouble (John 16:33). Jesus himself wept, and some theologians believe that Jesus even had a panic attack in the Garden of Gethsemane before His arrest. He understands your pain and He is not afraid of your feelings.
2. David comes messy. He doesn’t clean himself up before God. He doesn’t put on his finest robes to approach him. He doesn’t take a bath first. He doesn’t tidy up his space (which may have been a cave knowing David). He comes messy - as himself in that exact moment. You don’t have to put on your Sunday best and a fake smile to come to the foot of the cross. Come as you are. Ashamed. Depressed. Broken. Scared. Panicked. Come as you are.
3. Our Lord loves our vulnerability. He comes to God messy - but also vulnerable. David doesn't sugarcoat his feelings with His heavenly Father. He empties himself out in front of Him. He feels forgotten - so He tells God that. His thoughts feel overwhelming - so He tells God that. He feels full of sorrow - so He tells God that. He feels attacked by enemies - so He tells God that. David is truthful. How have you been hiding your real feelings from God? Why?
4. God can handle our requests. There is something so beautiful about David asking the God that He could not feel or see - to answer him. To give light to his eyes. To be present. Even in His despair, David still made requests. Again, we can look to the man who never sinned in his final hours of the Garden. He openly asks God to take the cup away from Him. Asking God for a request is a beautiful thing - even if He doesn’t answer it how you expect. He is still faithful. What do you want from Him? What do you want from your life? You can ask, Child, you can ask!
5. Lastly, after David pours his heart out to God, making his feelings and requests known - He turns His attention to something else. This can sometimes be the hardest thing to do in such a dark time. He uses the Hebrew word “Ani” or “But” which directly means “as for me”. “As for me, I trust in your unfailing love…” (Psalm 13:5) David knows that choosing to trust in God and rejoice in Him is countercultural. He also knows that these things are so hard to do in a state of mental illness and crisis. Yet, he still declares a piece of truth over himself: “As for me…”. The purpose of sharing this is not to say that mental health can be solved with “trust God”. Maybe sometimes it’s that simple - but most times, it takes therapy, community, and medication to truly help with some of our darkest moments. However, the significance of what David does is that He speaks to himself the truth - even if he doesn’t necessarily believe it at that moment. He may not trust in that moment, but David declares that he will trust nonetheless. He may not rejoice in that moment, but David declares that he will rejoice. And lastly, and possibly most importantly, David may not think God is good in that moment, but he remembers the ways that God was good in the past. How can you do the same today? What trust can you declare over yourself?