Hope in the Darkest Night

“Code Blue.”

The announcement that summons all available medical personnel to a life-or-death emergency—except this day it was the person I loved more than anyone in the world.

My wife's lungs had suddenly been overwhelmed with seven and a half liters of fluid.

She was drowning. The doctor shouted, “Code Blue!”

My mind went into overdrive, flooded with what this could mean. Had I held the love of my life for the last time? I’ve done my whole life with her. How can I do the rest of it without her?

I was gasping for emotional oxygen. I was desperate for hope.

Drowning is a pretty fair description of how it feels emotionally when one of life’s sledgehammers hits. In those moments that seem to knock the breath out of us: the death of a loved one, the death of a marriage, the health diagnosis, the prodigal son or daughter, the pink slip, the infertility, the failure.

For most of us, there has been—or there will be—that crushing time when we are desperate for a life preserver. We are drowning.

Hope really is the emotional oxygen that keeps us going. 

But hope has to be more than “when you wish upon a star,” or crossing your fingers, or just quoting inspiring slogans from a motivational speaker.

We need something more muscular, more durable, more authentic. There is hope like that. I know. It’s the air I’m breathing right now. 

Here is a real-life definition of hope. Of defiant hope:

Hope is a buoyant confidence, acknowledging the hurt, but anchored in an unseen but certain reality.

A hope that is a  confidence that squarely faces the loss and the unanswered questions, yet chooses to not be defined by them.

Hope requires choices that defy the seeming hopelessness you may feel.  

Night can be so dark. But every sunset in my lifetime has been followed by a sunrise. Without fail.

As we move through this plan, we will discover the choices that will help us breathe the life-restoring oxygen of hope.

These are choices that don’t deny but do defy the pain of your past, the grief in your heart, the wilderness that surrounds you, and the danger in our world. 

There is a way to make it through the darkest night. 

It’s called defiant hope!