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Day Six

Is There Such a Thing as “The One”?

Scripture: Matthew 22:37; Mark 10:7–8

Too many people approach dating with the idea that it’s all about finding “the one.” That there is this one person out there who is right for you. Once you find that person, you’re done because this person is perfect. Not truly perfect—we all know that nobody is perfect—but this person is perfect for you, just as you are perfect for them. They are your “soul mate.” 

I’m here to tell you this is a fairy tale. If you’re looking for your “soul mate,” or “the one,” or your “twin flame,” or whatever you want to call it—you’ll never find them. They don’t exist. They’re off riding unicorns with Bigfoot. 

You should be thankful for this. Although it may seem less magical or romantic, it is more hopeful. Finding “the one” can feel like a desperately difficult search—because it is. In reality, there isn’t just one. Instead, there are many “ones” available who would make a great mate for you. If you know how and where to look, the odds of finding one of the many are actually quite high. 

You see, when you marry someone, they do become “the one.” They’re the ones you’ve committed to love for the rest of your life. The Bible even says that the two of you together become one (Mark 10:7–8). And they will still be the ones when they gain weight, lose weight, lose their job, get cancer, or make mistakes. 

It’s not magical, but that’s what makes it wonderful. It means you’re accepted and loved and secure in your relationship despite your flaws. It means you’ll always pursue each other and work to reconcile any disagreements because that’s what you’ve taken a covenant vow to do. 

In other words, it’s a lot like our relationship with Christ. 

If you’re looking for a “soul mate,” what you’re really looking for is Jesus. He is perfect and is the only one who can truly satisfy your soul. 

Love Jesus first, with all your heart, and then find someone who loves him just as much and marry that person. Or, if you don’t marry, you’ll still be OK—because you’re not looking for someone else to make you complete. 

What does it mean to be “complete” in Jesus rather than with another person?