The Message of Leadership预览

LOVE HURTS

"Why love if losing hurts so much? I have no answers anymore; only the life I have lived. The pain now is part of the happiness then."
-Anthony Hopkins in Shadowlands

Any young lover who has failed in love will immediately agree that love can hurt. But after the wound has healed a little, they will also be the first to try to love again because of the joy it brings.

I remember my first love. It was immature, painful, wonderful, and hopeless all at the same time. When it failed, I could have just given up on love or learned from it and looked harder for a better, more satisfying relationship next time.

I chose the latter and I’m so glad I did. Several years later I found the love of my life, and we now have been married for twenty-five years. It has not always been easy. In fact there have been moments when I am sure my wife has wondered how she could be so unhappy. But those thoughts were only momentary and the shared joys have been immense and overflowing.

I’m no saint to live with. And my sweet wife has consistently blessed me by loving me through thick and thin. Her honest advice may hurt some times, but I can always depend on it. She has given me everything she has to give, and together we have two amazing children as the culmination of our union of love and commitment.

Love hurts—but it is well worth the pain and sacrifice. Nothing has given me more to live for than the love I have found with my wife and family. These are the ones closest to me, and no matter what happens, I can trust them with my life. Look for love, live for love, and you will find it. But in order to keep love, you must give it away.

Essential Insight 27: Give yourself to those you love; trust them to be faithful and accept their input into your life as you would any other act of love.