Love Life SoberНамуна

COMING HOME

Some of my reasons for my alcohol fast were obvious: I didn’t want to feel hungover all the time, I wanted to get better sleep, and I wanted to have the energy to work out and make better food choices.

But the biggest reason I wanted to make a change was to repair my relationships. My drinking was getting in the way of my marriage, big-time. When we both drank, we would bicker and wake up angry, not remembering what the fight was about so never able to resolve anything.

Then there were my children. When I think back on that time, it breaks my heart. God gave me these two beautiful, wonderful children and I didn’t even want to hang out with them because I would rather have been drinking. Thankfully, in sobriety, I have been able to prioritize my relationship with them and feel closer to them than ever before.

Alcohol also got in the way of my relationship with Jesus. I had grown so far apart from Him that I no longer recognized it myself. Waking up fuzzy meant there was no time for reading my Bible in the mornings. I would pray sporadically before falling asleep, but I didn’t create any space to be with God or hear from His Holy Spirit. My life felt desolate without Him.

When I think about my drinking and relationship with Jesus, I think about the prodigal son in Luke 15. Jesus told the parable of a young man who recklessly squanders his inheritance, only to find himself so hungry he’s thinking about eating pig slop. When he returns home, expecting nothing but a scolding, his father welcomes him with unconditional love and forgiveness.

Like this son, I had turned my back on Jesus. I ran away, taking all His blessings with me without so much as a “Thanks, Dad.” I fully immersed myself in the world, and the world gave me wine to cope, to reward my­self, and to let my hair down. When I finally realized there is zero fulfillment in doing life this way, I returned to Jesus in tears and asked for forgiveness. The beautiful thing is, He truly welcomed me home.

How do you relate to the son’s journey in Luke 15? How has God shown His faithfulness to you, even during times when you’ve strayed from Him?