Preserving a Sense of Closeness: A 3-Day Marriage PlanНамуна

A Time to Be Silent

There is a time for everything . . . a time to be silent and a time to speak.

Ecclesiastes 3:1, 7

I (JCD) still remember the day, just two weeks before Shirley and I were married, when we proudly drove off a used car lot in the gleaming white 1957 Ford sedan I had just purchased. Five blocks down the road, to celebrate this historic event, I leaned over to give Shirley a quick kiss.

It wasn't quick enough! At that instant two cars in front of us made an unexpected stop. I crashed into the first and knocked it into a second. The front of my gorgeous car crumpled like an accordion. Fortunately, there were no injuries, except to my pride.

Because of this stupid mistake, I couldn't afford to buy Shirley a wedding ring with even a small diamond, and the car we had dreamed of buying for so long was severely damaged. Yet Shirley never let the accident tarnish the romantic aura of our early days together. I never heard a word of criticism about it, and on our first anniversary, I bought her the diamond ring. Forty years later, Shirley still hasn't complained about my bad driving!

We urge you to think before you say hurtful and unkind words that will burn in the memory of your spouse for many years. Protect your romantic relationship, even when criticism seems justified. Your love for each other is a precious and fragile flower. Treat it that way.

Just between us . . .

·Do we actively protect the element of romance in our marriage?

·Are we wise enough to know when it is "time to be silent"?

·When life's misfortunes strike, is there still a feeling of romance between us?

Lord, You ask us to keep our marriage partner's interests uppermost in our minds, but sometimes this doesn't come naturally. Help us to be more thoughtful, giving, and forgiving in how we tend each other's hearts. Amen.

Excerpted from Night Light for Couples, used with permission.

Love is patient, love is kind . . . (1 Cor. 13:4, ESV)

So, as those who have been chosen of God, holy and beloved, put on a heart of compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience . . . (Col. 3:12, ESV)

"The Self-Giving Love of a Wife" (This article by Trina Alleyne is available on our website.)