Resist the Rut: 4 Keys to Kickstart Your HeartНамуна

Day 4: How Must You Think So You Can Thrive?

My Pastor always said, when harboring resentment or bitterness, “Life’s too short, God’s too good, and the Kingdom’s too important”. Truer words have never been spoken when considering factors that foster peace of mind. How many days have you awakened to find yourself still senselessly tormented by the way someone either betrayed, disappointed, confronted, or antagonized you?

I have wasted too many hours and rented too much mental space to other people who have frustrated me. Anxiety and stress seem to have a front-row seat to our lives without us feeling the need to pour gas on the fire. We have choices that require thought that requires energy, which requires a limited resource called time. Why must we waste it thinking the worst about other people? Yes, some people have hurt us, and some people have relinquished the right to earn our friendship and trust. Just like with forgiveness, we can forgive so we can preserve our relationship with our Heavenly Father, but we are not required to maintain a close connection with toxic individuals. Reconciliation does not mean a continuation of interaction.

We are not required to maintain a relationship with those who have hurt us, especially if they have not repented or asked for forgiveness. I have cut many people loose, often without closure or revenge (vengeance is the Lord's, Hebrews 10:30), where it may feel like they won that particular temporary battle, but my severing ties allowed me to win the ultimate war over bitterness, resentment, unforgiveness, and rage.

In addition to feelings of torment that come from our interaction with others, we also make choices to either run toward or slink away from our next task or dreaded directive. We can distract ourselves as a defense mechanism if we are anxiously anticipating a negative outcome. That leads me to...

Question #4: How must you think so you can thrive?

Drive or dread?

Many of us have spent years dreading encounters and endeavors that expose our discomfort and insecurity. Fear leads to apprehension which leads to dread and avoidance. Thoughts that prevent thriving are born out of self-doubt and limitation.

I want to be a man who dwells on passions and desires that drive me within my mission. A driven mindset usually leads to a thriving mindset.

Jesus was dreading the cross so much that he sweat blood in the garden of Gethsemane when He asked the Lord to take this cup from Him (Matthew 26:36-39). That said, how many people who are tormented by dread are thriving? Very few. God gave us a spirit of power, love, and a sound mind; not of fear (2 Timothy 1:7). A sound mind is one of determination and perseverance, not of discouragement and hopelessness. I want to function as the designer designed me to function.

In my experience, I become a driven force that seeks opportunities to serve in a significant capacity when I’m focused on my gifts, talents, and strengths. The Apostle Paul encourages us to run our race and run in such a way that chases after a higher calling in Christ. Choosing to focus on the right things distracts my stinking thinking of negativity about the wrong things. However, when I’m wrapped around the axle of my feelings and emotions in a state of dread, I’m no good to anyone or God’s Kingdom.

Ultimately, it’s a choice. Life throws nasty curveballs and opens doors through which we need to walk, but about which we are not excited. Dreading those thorny tasks of necessity only compounds our anxiety.

I want to be a man with his eyes up, his courage engaged, and one who leans into the heat of the situation; trusting God’s plan and promises.

TURNING POINT:

• List the names of people you need to forgive and release.
• Replace toxic thoughts with statements of gratitude throughout your day.
• List what you are dreading and what drives you. Eliminate the dread and lean in to those endeavors.