Hope for Your Hard DaysНамуна

God Is Infinite

Sometimes I forget, Lord, that You are Infinite, Unlimited in all ways…

Fear and anxiety gripped me. I struggled to squeeze out words between the sobs, to impart lucid thoughts to my oldest son 200 miles away. In the span of 30 minutes, I went from competent to desperate. Nothing had changed, but suddenly I was hit full force by the enormity of an unknown future for my daughter. Panic about Rachel’s future had never seized me so powerfully. The thought of dying doesn’t wreck me, but the idea of leaving my daughter behind does.

As a functionally nonverbal young adult with the intellectual capability of a 3-year-old, Rachel will always be at the mercy of whoever cares for her. That raises many concerns for when my husband and I are no longer here. Will her future caregivers protect her? Will they provide appropriate care keeping her clean and well-fed? What about her emotional and spiritual needs? Will they address those? Will they ensure she keeps warm while sleeping and that she has her favorite stuffed animal or pink blanket? If not, how can she let her needs be known?

I longed for answers that would calm my mother’s heart. But despite their best intentions, neither my son nor the few friends to whom I sent a panicked text could provide them. No one can. This world holds pain and brokenness for each of us, and we’re limited in how much we can control.

On that awful day, I needed to believe in something beyond my understanding, something bigger than human capability. I needed to believe that Rachel would never be left alone. I needed assurance for her future.

And that can only come from One who transcends time and space, the Alpha and Omega. God in His Infinity always was, always is, and always will be … where we need Him, when we need Him.

Sometimes I forget, Lord, that You are Infinite, Unlimited in all ways. You are the Alpha and the Omega; time and space do not hold You. I forget that You exist by Your own Power so that even when my situation seems impossible, it is possible for You. Remind me that in Your Infinity, You are never pulled in too many directions or stretched too thin. You do not run out of time. Help me remember, Lord, that no matter how great the ask, as a personal God with no beginning and no end, You will be where I need You, when I need You.

Truth Reminder: No matter how scary the future looks, I can trust God will always be where I need Him when I need Him.