Indisputable IdentityНамуна

God’s Intervention

“You’re going to audition, aren’t you, Sherry?” For at least the fourth time that week, someone asked about my plans to try out for a role in a movie being filmed at my church.

“No,” I said, acting as though it were not killing me to walk away from an opportunity to pursue a lifelong dream. I was too embarrassed to tell anyone that the very thought of auditioning caused me to picture my ugly face stamped on some film forever. And who on earth, I thought, would want to see that?

Now in my third year of living in darkness, I had gotten pretty good at avoiding relationships and making sure no one knew what was going on with me. I was showing up where everyone expected to see me, but those who knew me best realized I was simply not myself. My aversion to my reflection had extended from mirrors and picture frames in my apartment to bodies of water at state parks and decorated store windows in New York City. Being “the ugly girl who was not likable enough to matter” was the identity I owned, and there seemed to be nothing I could do about it.

Then one day, I heard a message preached on Psalm 139:14: “I will praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made.” Soon afterward, I heard someone speak on that same verse on Christian radio. And when I went to visit a friend at her church, once again, the message was on Psalm 139:14. It wasn’t long before I felt like I could not avoid running into that verse. I sensed the Lord leading me to write that verse on several index cards and place them in locations where I would constantly see them. He led me to recite it over and over again each day. God’s word—the truth, was actively changing my life. Romans 12:2 says, “Do not conform to the pattern of this world but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.” (NIV)

Not only was I encouraged by being crafted by the Creator and being in the process of mind renewal, but I was also struck by God’s pursuit of me—His refusal to let me go on any longer the way I had been living.

• What truth do you need to have ingrained in your heart and mind so that it becomes your default “setting?”
• What would you be willing to do to get the truth of God’s word embedded in your heart?
• Ask God to help you begin to journal today and physically record verses and passages that will aid in your transformation.