Hey, There, Girlfriend: Finding Courage for FriendshipНамуна

You, too, may have bundled up past hurts because of soured sisterhoods. Emotions linger, often wrecking our courage to try again. We wonder why we should strive for friendships only to be hurt and disappointed again.

In his final closing statements to Timothy, Paul offers sound counsel for navigating this emotional obstacle. Paul gives personal instructions. He notes where people have gone, who has remained, and which people to stay away from. He even requests his cloak (2 Timothy 4:10-15). Woven among these personal details lives the best advice for aiming toward what endures.

“At my first defense no one came to stand by me, but all deserted me. May it not be charged against them,” 2 Timothy 4:16

In the middle of the hurt and disappointment, Paul communicates a tremendous amount of Christ-likeness to be embraced.

What? Where was Luke? Where were his friends? Why on earth was he alone? This is an opportunity to wallow in disappointment and suffering, but Paul does not. Instead, he points Timothy to God’s ability to meet his needs when all humanity fails.

“But the Lord stood by me and strengthened me, so that through me the message might be fully proclaimed and all the Gentiles might hear it. So I was rescued from the lion’s mouth,” 2 Timothy 4:17

Paul wants Timothy and the reader to know people will disappoint us in tremendous ways. Sometimes those we think should show up for us will not. They will make choices we wouldn’t. Those closest to you may be insensitive, acting in ways you find unconscionable. You, too, might experience heartache from good friends or family. Yes. Godly people can let you down.

As if sharing wisdom in relationship dealings toward Timothy for the future, Paul writes, may it not be charged against them. In other words, these people are still our friends. It will hurt when it happens, but don’t hold it against them.

Chances are, you and I have let some people down, too. There may have been times we couldn’t be there or didn’t see the event as important as they did.

May it not be charged against us.

Courage calls us to aim toward handling our relationships like Paul, loving when it’s hard (Proverbs 17:17) and forgiving when it hurts (Colossians 3:13).

May we not charge it against them.