Overcome Porn: The 40 Day ChallengeНамуна

If you want to quit porn for good, there is a key factor to lasting freedom: having an ally to help you on your journey. This person is not the “porn police,” trying to catch you and punish you when you fail. They’re more like a coach or mentor, helping you identify areas where you struggle and encouraging you to keep pushing.

Why does this work? Because pornography thrives in secrecy. Removing the secrecy and shame is a key part of the recovery process. Allies help neutralize the shame by being safe and trusted people who don’t walk away when you stumble.

The best allies do three key things: they affirm, ask, and help you achieve.

• They affirm that they are  here to help you through this process. They aren’t here to be a judge;  they are here to be a friend.
• They ask questions about  your progress: “Have you been struggling?” “What’s going on?” If you are  struggling, they ask what you were experiencing at that time: “What  triggered it?”
• They help you achieve your  goals by helping you set action steps to move forward.

Action Step

Find an ally and start scheduling regular accountability conversations. It can be a friend, family member, pastor, or counselor. Or you can join a recovery group like the male-only “Samson Society.” 

Using accountability software on your devices will help support the relationship and provide better information for your ally to hold you accountable (you can try Covenant Eyes Screen Accountability for 30 days with the promo code youversion).

And if you already have an ally, that’s great! In your next meeting, take some time to talk to that person about how you think things are going.