Bulletproof MarriagesНамуна

  

Relationships

Our relationships with our coworkers, with people in general, are affected by the way we live at home, especially if we are married. Our personal life can be built up, encouraged, or held back by what happens at home. When there is no peace at home, our lives do not function properly, and it affects everything we do. 

We may ask ourselves why some marriages last while other marriages end up in divorce. What is the formula? It is not something magical. There is no simple answer to be found. 

The main reason why a marriage is successful is that the spouses have learned to put a filter on three different areas of their lives: a filter on what they say (their mouth), a filter on how they see each other (their eyes), and a filter on their hearts. 

First, Put A Filter On Your Mouth

What we say is powerful. If spouses can learn to use filters on their words, on what they declare over each other, they will avoid a lot of conflict over time. Ephesians 4:29 says that no foul language should come from our mouth, but only what is good for building others up. This is an instruction to live a life with God’s wisdom. There is a reason for every counsel God gives us, and it is really important to watch our language and the way we talk. 

There are logical, scientific, and sociological reasons for each of the practical guidelines that God has given us. It is not until we begin to put them into practice that we understand them and see their outcome. 

God is telling us that no foul language should come from our mouth. There are things that can be insulting to someone and even hurt them. There are times in our marriages when we say things that we should not say. We say things that might not consider offensive, like “You are old,” “You are fat,” and so many other things. We may think these phrases are not hurtful, but they can offend the other person. The words we say can cause such damage, it might take years to heal. Words generate realities. Words have the power of life and death.

 

Reflect

What kind of words are you saying to your spouse? What do those words generate in them? Is your heart open to listening to God’s wise counsel?

I pray that your words would express God in your marriage.