The Entrepreneur's BattleНамуна

Sexual Brokenness: Our Journey to Healing

No one wants to talk about sexual sin. It’s the dark stain—the scarlet A—on the lives of so many people, yet we too often act like it’s not there at all. And when it comes to statistics, faith-driven entrepreneurs aren’t excluded from this issue—in fact, in a lot of ways, we’re more at-risk for this temptation than most.

• 68% of church-going men and over 50% of pastors view porn on a regular basis
• 59% of pastors said that married men seek their help for porn use
• 87% of Christian women say they have watched porn
• 33% of women aged 25-and-under search for porn at least once a month

These numbers are a little overwhelming. But what do we do about them? When we hear people talk about pornography and sexual sin, a consistent theme that comes up is the idea of lust management. That means we need to stop doing what we’re doing, we need to put internet filters and accountability in place, and we need to make every effort to rid ourselves of this problem.

And that’s great. Internet filters, accountability, and counseling are all important and helpful things. But white-knuckling our problems only gets us so far, and that often leads to us ignoring the core issues behind this struggle. As our friend Jay Stringer has shared with us, if our sexual brokenness is like a river, then lust management is just one of the tributaries that pours into it. So, what are some of the others?

These vary from person to person and it requires diving deep into your own story to find out exactly what may drive this behavior, but some examples include a desire for power, a need for control, a way to cope with anxiety/uncertainty/confusion, or even a lack of affection and affirmation in our lives. There are countless other sources of sexual brokenness that we have to take the time to address, but for today, there’s good news.

God has given you grace.

That’s past tense for a reason. No matter what you have done, are doing, and will do, God’s grace covers it. It’s undeserved and something we could never earn. “Through the obedience of one”—through the sacrifice of Jesus—righteousness and eternal life have become available. This is the free gift given to all and accepted by those who have turned their lives over to Christ. Our response to this gift is simply to acknowledge our sin, confess it to God and others, and learn to accept the grace and forgiveness He offers.

“Where sin increased, grace increased all the more.” Sexual brokenness is an area of life where sin always seems to increase—whether in our own lives or in the lives of those around us—but know this: there is no sin that can ever outgrow God’s grace.

Further Thought

• What are some of the ways you’ve dealt with sexual brokenness in the past? What are the ways these approaches did and didn’t work?
• Who is someone in your life that you can have a conversation about this topic with? What would it look like for you to finally confess this thing you’ve kept hidden for so long?
• Why is it difficult to accept God’s grace? Why do you think there’s always a part of us that wants to earn our way into right-standing with God?