The DIY Guide To Building A Family That Lasts - A 6-Day DevotionalНамуна

Home Improvement Goal: 

Demolish Selfishness

Home Improvement Tool:

Build Kindness

Selfishness in the family makes us feel cramped for space and time. We can’t touch each other’s stuff without backlash. We may be criticized if we want or take time to ourselves. Or we may fail to understand or offer help to each other when that help could go a long way in easing another’s stress. Although the physical space issues that necessitate sharing can be annoying, the selfish attitudes behind the backlash, criticism, or lack of understanding can be even more frustrating.

We hear about this all the time as we counsel families. Nearly everyone would like to build a family less selfish and more kind. 

Why kindness? 

You’ve been kind throughout your life, so you know what kindness is. It’s making sure your spouse has his or her favorite peanut butter as opposed to buying the cheaper brand you’d prefer to buy; it’s listening to your spouse or child vent when you’d prefer to be reading your magazine or taking a nap; and it’s giving up watching your favorite home improvement television show so that you can spend time with your child who wants to watch SpongeBob.

Why are you kind? Why did someone else’s consideration of you matter? I believe the answer is the same for both questions—consideration makes people feel like their needs matter. We want our loved ones to know their needs matter to us, and we want to know that our needs matter to them. Selfishness, on the other hand, conveys the opposite—that our needs are more important than their needs. Just as no physical home is perfect, no home life is perfect. We’re human, so we know to expect some selfishness. But the less selfishness and the more kindness, the better!