Forgiveness At WorkНамуна

Air out the conflict — get allies involved if necessary

Clearing the air is the first step to resolving workplace conflict and getting to forgiveness. Jesus says that when a fellow believer does you harm you should point out the problem one-on-one and face-to-face. 

Your boss or coworker may not be an equal in the sense of the fellow believer mentioned in Matthew 18. You may have different beliefs, and there may be power dynamics at play, especially if the other person is your boss. Nevertheless, talking honestly and humbly face to face is good way to start to resolve conflict at work. You and the other person will likely understand each other better after sharing your thoughts calmly and listening to one another. 

If you fear reinjury from an imbalance of power, you could proceed to Jesus’ second step for conflict resolution: talk it over in the presence of two or three witnesses. Bring along a colleague who understands the situation or ask a trusted third party to be present. The goal is not to gang up on someone who hurt you, but to create an environment where each person can speak freely and safely with the goal of coming to a reconciliation.

Unfortunately, Cerys never tried to air out her issues with her boss. 

“There wasn't really the culture of talking about how you were feeling about things,” Cerys says. “The CEO was definitely not a feelings man, so coming to him and being like, ‘Oh, I felt really alone and overworked when I was in China’ wasn't really necessarily the thing to do.” 

Not speaking to her boss was a decision that Cerys ultimately came to regret. “I know that I wouldn't let it happen again, in terms of not standing up and speaking about quite how upset I was about something.”

Prayer: God, give me supporters in my life and in my work - people I can count on to help me through difficult situations. Show me how to talk through hurts at work. Show me what to say, and when and how to say it. Amen.

Further Exploration: Read more about conflict resolution in the Theology of Work Bible Commentary.