Two Roads: Please God, Or Trust Him?Намуна

Much of our difficulty accepting this new life has to do with the shame we carry. Shame. It whispers and hisses that no matter what you do, you will always be defined by what you did or what was done to you. Shame wants you desperately performing for acceptance you don’t believe you deserve.

That’s when we begin to form the fake god. We imagine him staring at us with a thin smile and a measured nod. He has to love us, but he’s not sure he likes us. His arms are folded. He wears an expression that says, “Yes, your sins are forgiven. Your ticket’s punched for eternity. But don’t get lazy! You’ve got to stop being such a slug. And don’t think I missed that last wrong thought you had four minutes ago. I’m not stupid. I still keep a list. I just don’t lose my temper as much. What are you staring at? Get to work!”

How can we draw close to a god we imagine saying, “Sure, your sins are forgiven, but you’re still the same failure. You had an excuse before, but not anymore.”

Because of our shame, many of us have pictured God “over there,” on the other side of our sin. And we imagine that with each failure, each sin, we grow farther and farther away, and it is our job to get “back to God.” This puts us back in the place of being the initiator, of imagining we are able to do something about our sin. Christ came because we couldn’t do anything about our sin—only He could. If we imagine Jesus on the other side of our sin, we can’t access His power and guidance in dealing with our sin.

Jesus is not on the other side of your sin. He is standing next to you, His arm around you, wanting to deal with that mound of garbage and pain together. You cannot resolve this sin without Him, and you were never meant to. Can you let yourself imagine this? Can you picture Jesus with His arm around you? Can you believe that the power of His death on the cross allows Him to stand right in front of you, on your worst day, and smile bigger and happier than any human being ever could?