True North: LIVE Free In MarriageНамуна

The last habit or ingredient to a thriving marriage is serving. Whether it is serving at your local church, a ministry that you’re passionate about, or maybe a neighbor in need, serving others is crucial.

Now let me also recognize that there is a time and season for everything. If you are trying to recover from an affair, a porn addiction, gambling, alcohol, or drug addiction, then maybe serving is your next season. When the pain and shock of hidden sins or betrayal first come to light, you might actually need to step back from serving to seek some intense counseling and healing. But not forever!

Serving others helps us take our eyes off of ourselves and focus on others and their needs. This is so important because if you never take your eyes off yourself, all you will do is focus on yourself and become selfish and self-seeking. When a marriage is struggling, plenty of selfishness and self-seeking is already occurring. Serving is a great way to refocus and take our eyes off ourselves and onto those who need help. What you often find is that your troubles aren’t as bad as you thought and you actually have a lot to be thankful for.

Serving also brings you and your spouse to a unified front. No matter all the other issues you might disagree on, at least on this issue you can agree, and that is a great start. So start the conversation with your spouse, and ask God: “Where would you like us to serve? What is a need we can fill?”