Grace–Simple. Profound. - Grace and ForgivenessНамуна

Forgiveness Is A Gift

What is love acted out in war? I think it looks a lot like forgiveness. Forgiveness is a gift inside of the gift of grace and it’s underestimated many times. Christians forgive not out of the goodness of their heart, but because they have been forgiven. You may think that somebody has hurt you far worse than anything you have done to anyone else. In comparison it doesn’t make sense. However, the reason is because you’re comparing your relative goodness to the goodness of the person who hurt you and that’s the wrong comparison. What we are meant to do is compare our relative goodness to the infinite holiness of God. The difference is staggering. That’s the point of Jesus’ parable of the king forgiving the official from his debt. We demonstrate that we are children of God by loving our enemies, putting love into action, which looks a lot like forgiveness. 

In reality, wounds against you are a debt that a person owes you. Forgiveness is a choice when you release someone from that debt. It’s not simple. It’s hard. You’re never going to feel like it. It’s a process. You don’t just forgive, release them from the debt, and walk out happy. That’s not reality. You choose to release someone from a wound and then you have to remember that you chose to do that. Let’s be honest with each other, there’s no forgetting in forgiveness. But there’s a choice to not dwell on it. 

If we choose to not forgive, there are other options waiting. There’s retribution, revenge, or resentment. None of those are good options. Paul says, “Be kind and merciful, and forgive others as God forgave you.” 

Forgiveness is powerful. Understanding the point of forgiveness is the first step. Forgiveness is based on faith that God is a better justice maker than us. When we choose to forgive and release someone from the debt, that is a very faith-based decision. 

How about asking someone else to forgive you? Two simple steps. First, admit what you did. Even if you don’t understand. You don’t justify. Don’t excuse or explain. All you say is, “I can see that I’ve hurt you.” Step two, “Will you please forgive me?” That’s it. Its putting the ball in the other person’s court so that they might be able to choose to forgive. That’s the gift that you give the other person because the goal of forgiveness is to regain relationship. 

God has forgiven us the debt we could never repay. Out of that great bank of grace, God allows us to give grace and forgiveness to others who wound us. That has powerful opportunity to transform your relationships and heal the un-grace that is alive in all of our relationships. 

For more Grace – Simple. Profound. resources – podcasts with Scot Pollok, and a downloadable book – visit gsot.edu/simplegrace. The Grace Center for Spiritual Development at Grace School of Theology provides non-degree studies, live online bible study opportunities, and resources like this devotional.