Being Real In Our MarriagesНамуна

It’s about my choices and not my spouse’s actions 

Christian living is usually considered as a life filled with rules defining ideal standards. The fact that we tend to fall short of the standards brings a sense of insecurity, judgment, or depression making life miserable. The Bible is filled with stories of hope in spite of our shortcomings.

David committed adultery with Bathsheba. When Bathsheba became pregnant, he tried hiding his mistake instead of admitting it. Eventually he planned a murder to hide his mistake. He then took Bathsheba as his wife and the baby born to them died immediately. God still blessed David and Bathsheba with another son, Solomon, who became the heir to the throne. 

When David was confronted by God through his prophet, he repented and went through the consequences of his action. Yes, he had to live through seeing his son rape his daughter and then leaving her. He had to see murder inside his own family. He had to run away from his palace, in fear of his life from his own son. He had to hear how his son slept with his concubines so all could see. Instead of rejoicing the death of his son who was trying to wipe him out, he grieved. He brought confusion to his men and the kingdom as his family losses overwhelmed him. He failed to encourage the men who risked their lives for him against his son. His life seemed a mess. 

This same David was called “a man after God’s own heart” because of his response. David accepted and confessed his mistake when God confronted him through His prophet. He did not blame anyone or give excuses but took responsibility. Like David we need to pray ‘create in me a clean heart … and renew a right spirit within me”. We need to start taking responsibility for our actions and accepting our mistakes. This should lead us to repentance and reconciliation. 

David willingly went through the consequences with God’s help. He did not get angry with God but went through life getting his strength from God. There can be healing in our marriages when we respond to God's call with repentance . Even after our bad choices, God will help us find healing and purpose in life when we start trusting Him with our choices. 

Are we ready to take responsibility for our actions leading to repentance and reconciliation, that God can heal our marriages?