NIV Leadership Bible Reading PlanНамуна

Conflict Management

One thing is certain: As a leader, you'll face relational conflicts. No leadership model exists that will allow you to avoid them. The question isn't "Will I face conflicts?" but "How can I best manage conflicts when they arise?"

When Jesus addressed problems, he tackled them head-on. While delivering the Sermon on the Mount (and later in Matthew 18) he dealt with the issue of conflicts brought about either by others offending us or by our offending them. While the Lord was addressing the problem of sin, there are broader principles at work in his teaching. And no matter which side has caused the problem, the solution is the same: First, go to the person with whom you are experiencing a conflict and address the issue face-to-face. Avoid involving a third or fourth person, especially if their knowledge of the situation will worsen the problem for the offending individual. Such discussions tend to intensify the conflict and further undermine the relationship.

Second, go to the person quickly. Jesus counseled that if someone is worshipping God and remembers that they offended a friend, it is appropriate to stop right there and go immediately to the offended individual. With those words Jesus made it clear that relational harmony is so important that it must be achieved before effective worship can take place (see Matthew 5:24). After all, how can a man or woman connect with God when they have unresolved relational issues with a brother or sister?

Effective leaders don't ignore conflict. They manage it by creating an environment in which people are enabled to work through relational friction on a one-on-one basis. Only after such efforts have failed are others allowed to enter the conflict, and then only for the purpose of bringing about reconciliation. Conflicts can't be avoided. But they can be managed. And a wise leader will be devoted to learning how to do that.