TheLionWithin.Us: Why We Should Not Make Our Children Our Idolsనమూనా
Obedience
One great example, if not the greatest, of a parent's obedience to God has to be found in Samuel’s mother, Hannah.
Scripture tells us that she longed for a child and fervently prayed to God for a son. She lived for years watching her husband's other wife conceive and have children, and Hannah’s pain was immense. God answered her prayers, and she bore Samuel.
However, Hannah made a vow that if God granted her a son, she would dedicate him to the Lord's service. This was a huge moment of faith being put to the test. Let’s be real for a minute. How often do we beg and plead with God for a blessing and when it comes to fruition, it is so easy to get caught up in the joy of the moment and truly miss the opportunity to worship the King of Kings for the provision. This is not the case for Hannah. True to her word, she brought Samuel to the temple and left him to be raised by Eli the priest. Hannah’s obedience and selfless sacrifice demonstrate the depth of her faith and her understanding that Samuel was a gift from God, meant to serve Him. She refused to let Samuel become an idol as she knew her personal relationship with God far exceeded any earthly responsibilities that she found herself in.
Hearing accounts such as Hannah's often leaves us with more questions than answers. At the end of the day, we need to be honest with ourselves and understand why we idolize our children. Upon reflection, several factors seem to contribute to this modern form of idolatry:
- Self-Idolization: Many parents often see their children as extensions of themselves, projecting their own desires and aspirations onto them. Relating this back to the sports example, it can be manifested by cheering for the last name on the back of the jersey instead of the first. This leads to a desire for their children to achieve and succeed, often to validate the parents' sense of worth. This can create a ton of pressure on the children individually, and when they fail to meet the parent's expectations, anger and resentment often begin to emerge.
- Societal Pressure: There is immense societal pressure to showcase our children's achievements as a reflection of our success as parents. Social media has poured jet fuel on the social pressures across the board. It is crucial to remember that social media is the equivalent of looking at professional sports highlights. While we see the amazing action, we never truly see reality. Honestly, most of the “perfect” pictures are surrounded by multiple takes, argumentative kids, and good old-fashioned filtering. If you don’t believe me, line up a family picture day and see how the stress level will send you over the roof! But when you speak about the final product, what do people always say? “We are so blessed”. Social pressure is higher than ever and recognizing it is crucial.
- Lack of Deeper Meaning: The evil one has done a great job of distorting our view of what it means to be a disciple of Christ. In a secular world where traditional institutions and sources of meaning are questioned or disregarded, parents often find meaning in their children's accomplishments. While we should celebrate and advocate for our children wholeheartedly, that in and of itself will never fully and finally satisfy us. Our source of meaning has to come from our direct connection with the Lord and when that is circumvented by elevating anything (kids, sex, money, etc.) in front of Him, then a distorted reality will unfortunately be the result. Reminding ourselves of the power of the Gospel daily and the finishing work of the cross and how Jesus paid the price for YOU is essential for making the crucial connection to being the person God has called you to be.
Questions to Consider
- How do you handle situations when your children do not meet your expectations, and what steps can you take to ensure your reactions are grounded in love and understanding rather than pressure and resentment?
- What practical steps can you take to ensure that your children see and understand the importance of your faith and commitment to God as the foremost priority in your life?
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How are you ensuring your children grow as disciples of Christ rather than simply becoming the center of your universe? This can be the hardest part of parenting, and we address areas to consider head on by showing a balanced approach to parenting that honors God and fulfills your divine purpose.
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