Comparison and Envy

Jesus was clear: the greatest commandment, after loving God, is to love others. How do we love them? As we also love ourselves, the commandment says. I don’t know about you, but I don’t always get that one right. The Bible also offers a different “how to love” guideline: we are to love as Jesus loves us. Our love for others is one of the proofs to the world that you and I love God and follow Jesus.

Why is it so hard sometimes? The good news is that we get to bring our messy selves to God and let Him teach us how to love others as we learn to love ourselves. Let’s look at five things that sometimes make it hard to love, and how we can be free of them.

At the 2012 Summer Olympics, Chad le Clos from South Africa beat US swimmer Michael Phelps in the 200-meter butterfly event by just 0.05 seconds. When they met again at the 2016 Olympics, Phelps was focused on just one thing: swimming. Le Clos was not. He wanted another victory and some of Phelps’s stardom. In the final lap, he turned his head to see where Phelps was in comparison to him. Le Clos lost the race by 0.7 seconds. That one glance took him from being the defending Olympic gold medalist to not even making the podium. This is what comparison can do to a person.

When we are so caught up in what’s happening with others, whether that’s wanting what they have or wanting to be better than them, we will find it impossible to love them.

The numerous verses in the Bible that instruct us not to envy others aren’t about restricting our behavior but rather, they are about revealing our hearts. Envy makes our bones rot and leads to disorder. Comparing ourselves to others displays ignorance and pride.

One remedy for comparison is to love and show kindness to others actively, celebrating with them even if it hurts. Putting on humility and valuing another’s accomplishments can end our tendency to compare.

In what ways can you see that comparison or envy affects your ability to love? This week, select someone you have envied or compared yourself to and congratulate them for a specific accomplishment.