Unexpected Homeschooler నమూనా

Sibling Rivalry

Your greatest fear in this decision to home educate may be knowing that having your kids at home all day and night, every single day, means lots of arguing and squabbling. Or down and out fights. 

“Would you two just get along??” Isn’t this the heart cry of every mom for her kids? All the bickering, fighting, wrestling, yelling, slamming of doors...It’s very overwhelming. It’s too much. 

Many call it sibling rivalry. While I believe this is a misnomer (do we call it marriage rivalry?), siblings never seem to just “get along”.

Do you know why? It’s because they are being trained—by you! It is no accident your children, with their completely opposite personalities were placed into your family. Nor is it an accident that you were chosen as their parent. Think of it as marriage training! Aren’t you and your husband almost complete opposites? 

But how do you handle all these disagreements with your kids? I know you feel like a referee, a broken record of repeated appeals and commands. I know you feel like there is no academic learning that will ever be possible because of it. I also know that as you continually demonstrate and encourage your children to love and prefer one another, at some point they will choose those qualities as their own, even if it’s when they are 21. 

Will they be perfect at it? No. Will you still be repeating the same things until they move away from your home to live on their own? More than likely, yes. 

Remember they are in training, just as we are. Thankfully, Jesus hasn’t called us to perfection, but instead, to daily choose His perfect way. 

Relationships are the place we get to practice love! And as we practice aligning our hearts with His, the gaps between our relational failures and successes will become shorter and shorter. 

Through your efforts and most of all from your example, your children will learn more than any words you can ever say. 

Father, this is the scariest part of having my kids home all the time. All the arguing! I think this may push me over the proverbial ledge. I also think this is an area that will keep me running to You for patience, self-control, and guidance. I’m choosing right now to focus on You instead of what may happen in the days to come. I’m praying for my children’s hearts right now. I know all these changes are hard for them too. May Your joy flood our home, beginning with my own heart. Thank You for loving me. 

Consider reading Paul Tripp’s excellent book Parenting: 14  Gospel Principles That Can Radically Change Your Family