Ministering With Grace to the DivorcedSmakprov
Help the Abused
“Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves; ensure justice for those being crushed” (Proverbs 31:8).
We cannot afford to take lightly abuse of any kind. It is important to realize that domestic abuse often escalates from threats and verbal assault to violence. Whether the abuse is emotional, psychological, sexual, financial, or physical, it is all damaging to a person made in the image of God. God's Word repeatedly calls us to "rescue the weak and the needy" (Psalm 82:4). Often, those who are in abusive relationships need the help of others to escape the situation.
When we teach about marriage, we can teach the Scripture condemns abuse. While the Bible does not directly cite marital abuse as a justification for divorce, it lays out several issues that are helpful when counseling someone in an abusive relationship. Paul includes common characteristics of abuse in the same list as idolatry and witchcraft: “sexual immorality . . . hostility, quarreling, jealousy, outbursts of anger, selfish ambition . . . drunkenness” (Galatians 5:19-21). Verbal abuse such as harsh words, slander, and dirty language are sin (Ephesians 4:31). Abuse of any form and towards anyone can never be justified.
Many believers think that because of the Bible’s teaching on the permanence of marriage, they are required to stay in an abusive relationship. But the abusing spouse has already broken the marriage covenant through such behavior. Violence in any form, whether physical, sexual, psychological, or verbal, is sinful. No person is expected to stay in an abusive relationship or marriage.
All believers as part of the family of God must take the call as a family seriously. We are called to be our “brother’s (or sister’s) keeper.” We are called to lay down our lives for one another, to have pity on those in need (1 John 3:17). This means going beyond the surface in our relationships and interactions with one another. We must call out those who abuse in our midst, and we must help the abused find help in the safety of our families. You may be the difference between someone finding rescue or ending up dead from an abusive relationship. Because you love, you care, and because you care, you will intervene.
Reflection
Are you concerned that any of your family or friends may be in an abusive relationship? Intervention is not something to undertake lightly, so pray and ask God to direct you to resources or chat with a mental health professional who can guide you. Pray that God will give you the opportunity and the courage to intervene.
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Many good people have been wounded by spouses they loved, only to be further wounded by their communities and churches. Is “God hates divorce” really all we have to say to them? Let this devotional equip you to minister with grace to those wounded by divorce.
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