Hey, There, Girlfriend: Finding Courage for FriendshipShembull

Years ago, my husband and I packed our family into a moving truck, sold the house, and left no forwarding address. We showed up at the new location with bright smiles in our attempt to leave the pain behind. Inside, we remained battered and bruised emotionally because of deep relational hurts we packed up along with our furniture.

Still, God was working. We found ourselves drawn to a couple at church. She knew everyone, having lived in that town all her life, sporting inner and outer beauty and sophistication. He was a coach and the understated but hilarious life of the party. A sweet relationship developed in time, and I have never been more thankful.

After we had been friends for a long time, I found the courage to ask how they had room for us. Our need was obvious. Friendless, broken, and desperate for relationships defined us. Why did they befriend us?

Tears flowed from my put-together friend. She never explained the tears, but I realized they needed us just when we needed them.

Experience has taught me that when I feel alone and need a friend, I am most likely not the only one. God is working in someone’s life who needs a friend as well. This is the juncture at which we find Philippians 4:18 at work.

“And my God shall supply all your need according to His riches in glory by Christ Jesus.”

Most adults have room for a new friend. We are not alone in our sense of isolation and friendlessness. Rich, true, and loyal friendships require that we believe God is preparing just the right friends for us; people who will like who we are, love us despite it and even need us because of who we are.

Good and lasting friendships bloom when you and I are mutually encouraged by each other’s faith (Romans 1:11-12). Therefore, these relationships transcend decades, seasons of life, or favorite pastimes. Forget selecting people who are like you, or even your same age. Some of the dearest friends God has ordained for you may be thirty years older than you or the same number of years younger.

Remember, you are not alone in your loneliness. Ask God to prepare your future friends as He prepares you to be women who mutually encourage each other’s faith as you experience life together.