The Proverbs 32 Woman: A 5-Day Devotional PlanShembull

It’s Not Gossip if Your Head is Bowed

Once I heard my mother on the phone gossiping about another friend’s “issues." I busted her and said, “Mom, You are a Christian!” She said, “Baby, we don’t have issues. We have prayer requests. I just needed to know how to pray.” 

When I started taking my faith seriously, the number one thing God convicted me of was my mouth. I have always been an entertaining storyteller. But just because it’s funny doesn’t mean I should share it. 

I had a bad habit of calling my closest friends when I felt wronged or slighted, all in the name of “I need advice.” I wasn’t being malicious. My gossip habit stemmed from a deep-seated need to be told I’m right. 

So now that I’m supposedly a mature Christian, I try to tell Jesus my drama, but I usually end up muttering, “You saw that, right? Are You going to deal with them since You won’t let me?” 

I still struggle when I truly want advice on how to handle my frustration. So I came up with a plan. When tempted to gossip, I call a friend and tell only the facts, no names. By not revealing anyone’s identity, I’m able to discuss calmly what happened without feeling guilty. And in the end it’s usually my stuff that’s upsetting me in the first place. 

In today’s social media, internet-trolling, mean-spirited world, gossip is a blood sport, and I don’t want to be an all-star player. Praying doesn’t make it okay to gossip. So the test I give myself is to ask, “Could Jesus be in on this conversation and say it’s okay?” 

We don’t have to keep all our feelings inside when we’re hurt and struggling, but we do need to be strategic about who we share them with and how. 

Dear God, 

It’s hard to find the line between asking for advice and gossiping about another person. Please show me when I’m about to cross that line in my conversations and give me the tools I need to keep my mouth shut. If I have something juicy to vent about, remind me that You will listen and nobody will get hurt. Only you can soothe my hurting or angry heart. 

In Jesus’ name,

Amen.