UNCOMMEN: Uncommen Words Of Husbands, Dads, & LeadersChikamu

Day 2 - Uncommen Words of a Husband

Proverbs 10:14 - "Wise men store up knowledge, but with the mouth of the foolish, ruin is at hand."
 
Men, we are often our own worst enemy when it comes to communication. Whether you are newly married or a veteran like me (33+ years with my wife), you should have come to understand that the way you and your wife communicate will determine the happiness of your household. Happy wife / Happy life.
 
By nature, men are fixers. We want a small explanation of the problem while we are putting on our hero outfit and cape so we can spring into action and fix the problem. Women usually want to explain in detail what is going on, and they expect us to do something we rarely do well… listen.
 
Someone asked me: “What was the most surprising thing you've experienced in owning your own business?” Without hesitation, I said “People’s shocking inability to communicate effectively”.
 
But God doesn’t want that for our marriages. He wants clear, sound, truthful, kind, and open communication with each other. The number one thing I pray for during my quiet time is wisdom. Not that I’m channeling my inner King Solomon. But rather, I want to know the mind of God in every situation in my life. I want to store up knowledge and communicate effectively with my wife.

My wife and I do marriage studies frequently just to keep our marriage in tip-top shape and one of best ones we've done was "The Five Love Languages" by Gary Chapman. It talks about the process of finding your love language and how you like to be communicated to. Once you and your wife have determined what your love languages are (there are usually two), you can then understand how to communicate to each other. If her love language is quality time and you keep giving gifts with no appreciation from her, it gets frustrating. It's important to learn how someone communicates and then communicate that way toward them. It sounds very basic, but it's one of the most overlooked things when it comes to communication.

As with anything, you will only get out what you put into a marriage, and communication is at the heart of everything.
 
Questions:
 
How do you and your wife communicate?
When was the last time you did a marriage study?
When was the last time you prayed for your wife?
 
Challenge:

Take the marriage Study - "The Five Love Languages" by Gary Chapman. Learn what your wife’s love language is while she learns yours.