The God Who Hears: 7 Days in Paul's Prayers From PrisonChikamu

Day 5: The Love of Your Life

In telling the church in Philippi about his prayer for them, Paul begins by focusing on the foundation of one of the fruits of true spiritual maturity—love. He writes, “This is my prayer: that your love may abound more and more in knowledge and depth of insight” (Philippians 1:9). We need to ask God not only for a love that shows but a love that grows—a love that will abound more and more.

Real love never remains the same in quality or quantity. It’s one thing to possess love but another to progress in love. We begin with our love for God, the one we love the most because he’s the one who loves us the most. From there, our love grows wider, meaning we grow in our ability to love more people - parents, children, other family members, neighbors, friends—and even enemies (Matthew 5:4; Luke 6:28, 35).

Our love grows deeper. Pray for a love that flows outward and overflows! If you pour a carbonated drink into a glass of ice too quickly, fizz will explode to the top of the glass and overflow. Our love for God, the church, our family, our friends, our neighbors, and even our enemies begins to overflow like exploding fizz. It abounds!

The love Paul describes is agape love—a divine love. It’s a godlike love consisting of more than emotion. It’s an action. C.S. Lewis put it brilliantly when he said this:

Do not waste time bothering whether you “love” your neighbor. Act as if you did. When we do this, we find one of the great secrets. When you are behaving as if you love someone you will presently come to love him.*

As Paul did on behalf of the Philippians, we ask God to give us this mature love that will not only abound more and more but “in knowledge and depth of insight.” How does love grow in knowledge? In the Bible, the word “knowledge” almost always refers to the knowledge of God. Remember what Peter said? “Make every effort to add to your faith goodness; and to goodness, knowledge” (2 Peter 1:5). True love always comes from God, and the more you know him, the better you will love him and the better you will love others the way he loves them.

True love is not blind. True love knows. True love discerns, and true love acts. When you see someone on a wrong path, taking them away from God, love them enough to show them the right path and help them get there. You are responsible for doing this the right way, with love, not only for the sake of others but for your sake, too. Paul said, “Speaking the truth in love, we will grow to become in every respect the mature body of him who is the head, that is, Christ.” (Ephesians 4:15)

Be warned, loving someone doesn’t ensure they will love you back. Mature love doesn’t give love to receive it; it gives love expecting nothing in return. This is true even when we don’t feel love toward someone. Someone defined love as “a feeling unlike any feeling you have ever felt before,” but love is not a feeling; It is an action - something we do whether we feel it or not.

Love is not blind. True love sees. True love knows. True love discerns. True love acts. But be warned: Mature love that abounds in knowledge and discernment will always do what is best for the other person even if it means they may not love you back. But mature love doesn’t give love to receive it—it gives love expecting nothing in return.

This, then, should be the love of your life and the love with which you pray to the God who hears for the people in your life—agape love.

Father, I love you because you are love. I admit I don’t always love as I should, but may my love grow wider and deeper. May I love more people and love people more, knowing and discerning that the best way to do that is to first love you with all of my heart. In Jesus’ name, I pray, amen.

* C.S. Lewis, Mere Christianity (London: Fontana, 1952), 113-114.