Gen Z Daters–This One’s for YouChikamu

Communicating

Communication is one of the most important aspects of dating as a Christian. This is especially true for Gen Z daters, who are more accustomed to texting and snapchatting than having a phone or in-person conversations. You can only convey so much emotion through an emoji, and–hate to break it to you–but snapchatting is no way to really get to know someone’s heart.

You need to communicate openly and honestly from the very beginning. You may even consider going a bit old school and chatting over the phone, FaceTime, or even in person more often than not. It’s much easier to share deep feelings and have meaningful conversations when you can see the other person, hear their tone of voice, and connect face-to-face. Here are some of the most important things to communicate about when you start dating someone.

Your Beliefs

You may be tempted to “hide” your faith in the beginning for various reasons. Maybe you’re afraid people won’t swipe right on you if you talk about God in your dating profile. Maybe you don’t want people to judge you based on your religion before getting to know you. While these reasons are valid, it is still a better choice to be open and honest about your beliefs from the beginning. If you’re looking for someone who shares and respects your beliefs and values, then anyone who swipes left or judges you because of them isn’t the person God has for you.

Your Boundaries

The Bible tells us to “flee from sexual immorality,” which means it’s important to have physical boundaries in a dating relationship as a Christian. It’s also important to be open and upfront about your boundaries. Whether you’re waiting for sex until you’re married or you don’t want to hold hands or kiss until you get to know someone better, that’s okay. You can have whatever physical and emotional boundaries make you feel safe and comfortable while dating. It’s another one of those situations where someone not respecting or accepting your boundaries likely means they aren’t the one for you, especially when you put your boundaries in place to honor God.

Your Expectations

Not everyone gets on a dating app for the same purpose. Some people are looking for a summer fling, others for a one-night stand, and others for a long-term relationship that leads to marriage and a family. Let people know what you’re looking for from the start, so you spend less time connecting with the wrong people and more time connecting with people who want the same things as you. It’s also important to ask someone what they’re looking for if they don’t volunteer the information from the start. Honesty is always the best policy, and it will make the entire dating experience much easier and more enjoyable.

Start today by asking God to help you find the words to say with this prayer:

Dear God,

Thank you for the gift of communication. I pray You would help me use my words wisely and communicate well as I meet and chat with new people. Please guide my conversations and help me listen well and respond thoughtfully and honestly, with kindness and respect. Help me communicate my beliefs, boundaries, needs, and expectations in helpful and constructive ways. In Jesus’ name, Amen.