A New Beginning: Starting Fresh Chikamu

New Friends

Friendships are so important to our lives. For some of you, the topic of friendships might not seem too deep, but the reality is, friendships have a big impact on our lives. All our relationships, over time, continue to have an impact on our lives today -- for the good or bad. They shape how we do life, our values, and the beliefs we hold.

You can probably think of friends from your early childhood who were formative in those years, but the experiences from those friendships live well beyond that season of life. You can also probably think of some friends who were a little crazy and convinced you to do some crazy stuff. They might have been those friends your parents didn’t like -- and for good reason -- because they got you in a mess of trouble! But friends are those with whom we laugh together, cry together, make dumb decisions together and then laugh about those dumb decisions! 

Here’s the truth you’ll find in Scripture. As we look at the interaction of people in the Bible, we see God using friendships to accomplish His will in people’s lives. Time and time again we see God using a friend to encourage, support, and even rebuke when needed to help guide and direct our lives. Friends ARE for encouragement, but real friends also show us when we get off the path. This is God’s design, and it's why friendships are so important to you being all that God wants you to be. 

The story of Jonathan and David’s friendship tells us three things about real friendship. First, real friends overlook differences. Why did Jonathan, David -- or even Jesus and the Disciples -- overlook so many issues? 

Jonathan, David, and Jesus all focused on the person and not everything around the person. They were able to separate the person, who has such great value, from the circumstances, values, and beliefs that they held. This is so important -- if you can do this it will help with everything. 

Jesus did not compromise on His beliefs. Not in the least, and some hated Him for it, but He was secure in who He was and what He believed. That didn’t stop Him from loving others who disagreed with Him. He even went as far as to die for them. Wow, what an example to us!

The most mature people you’ll ever meet are the ones who can connect and talk to anyone, yet they have strong confidence and beliefs about their own values and where they are going. 

Second, real friends look out for one another. Real friends don’t let friends:   

• Shame themselves   
• Give up on their marriages   
• Walk away from God   
• Treat their spouse with disrespect   
• Become isolated   
• Make decisions that will destroy their lives

Friends don’t just stop their friends from doing certain things, they also encourage the right things. Friends call you up when you’re hurting. Friends push you to take a step of faith. Friends help you stay connected to the church. Friends are examples of what you should be in your marriage, family, and career. These friendships give us the strength to reach the heights that God wants for us. It’s this community of friends who are there for us.

Third, this story tells us that real friendships look to carry on the blessing. So much of this next generation struggles with identity and good relationships outside of a device. We can’t remove or change the world they live in, but we can give them and model for them the very thing they need and are longing for––good friendships. We can carry on the blessing of great friendships. We could pass on the blessing.

Reflection Questions:  

1. What relationships in your life do you keep your distance from because they don’t think like you or talk like you or believe like you?   
2. What friendships do you have that encourage you and give you strength to reach the heights that God wants for you?   
3. How can you be a model to others of real friendship?