Single but in a Relationship With GodChikamu

God wants me to be single but….

Are you afraid to be single? Before you answer this question, are you currently dating or pursuing someone that you know God is telling you to let go of? If your answer is yes, then your answer to my first question should also be yes. 

The truth is if we can’t let someone go when God has told us to let them go, then we are afraid to be single. We may be afraid that we won’t find someone like this person who we would love, or that we won’t find contentment as a single person. I struggled with the fear of singleness for the longest time, feeling afraid that I wouldn’t find someone I would love and one that God would approve. 

I thought I was alone with this fear until I spoke out my fears to others. It turns out that there are many others who are afraid of never meeting the one that God has for them, or that they won’t be happy being single. 

For the longest time, this fear (and false belief) caused me to be in the wrong relationships. The first relationship I was in was toxic and manipulative. I was 16 years old and my boyfriend was 26 years old. Fast forward to when I was 18, I left my home to be with him (who I thought would be my everything) to find out later he wasn’t and could never be my everything.  

Eventually, I would end up dating another guy who seemed to be my dream man and one that God would approve of because he was a Christian and met my standards. However, as I got closer to God, I soon realized that this guy wasn’t the one for me to date, nor was I in a place to date. There were plenty of red lights in our relationship and the biggest one was that we were falling into sexual sin. 

Not only were these red lights convicting me, but I also wasn’t feeling satisfied in my life. I thought being in a relationship would bring me ultimate satisfaction, but I learned that Jesus is truly the only one who can bring fulfillment to our hearts. 

This is the season where God wants to show you that He is the missing piece in your life. It can be easy to think that we are missing something when we don’t have a boyfriend/girlfriend, but the reality is that Jesus is all we need. 

I thought that having a husband would complete me, but God showed me that only He can complete me. I kept feeling like I was missing something because I was filling my heart with the wrong thing. 

Jesus is the missing piece to complete us. “The Lord is my portion; therefore I will wait for him” (Lamentations 3:24 NIV). This verse reminds us that God—not a successful career, spouse, or family—is our portion. He is our missing piece to complete our soul. 

We can rest knowing that when we put our hope in God, He will never fail us. He is good and will leave us filled—never empty. “The Lord is good to those whose hope is in him, to the one who seeks him” (Lamentations 3:25 NIV). 

What have you been trying to fill your emptiness with? Will you seek God and make Him your portion? 

If God is calling you to be single or to let go of someone, don’t answer with a “but”—give Him your “yes”. You won’t regret your yes to God.