In UnisonChikamu

Adrienne

I vividly remember the day Jeremy and I got married. There was no human on the planet to whom I felt closer, but little did I know we were practically strangers on our wedding day. Compared to how well we know each other now and the depth of friendship that exists between us, I realize the closeness I felt to Jeremy on our wedding day was only a shadow of what was to come. 

If we see our marriages as lifelong journeys in which we can grow and evolve, then I believe we will live each interval of life with a lot more grace and understanding. What are we sowing into our marriages today to make them last the next fifty-plus years? 

The only way to have a truly healthy marriage is to live in unison with Jesus. If we remain in Him, everything else in our lives will be permeated by the fullness of His life in us. If Jesus isn’t the focus and center of our lives, then someone or something else is.

Jesus made the process for following Him very clear: deny ourselves, pick up our crosses, and follow Him (Luke 9:23). Obviously, it is impossible to literally follow Him to crucifixion every day, carrying a cross on our backs as Simon of Cyrene did (Luke 23:26), so what did Jesus mean by these three instructions?

When the apostle Paul wrote to the Galatians, he explained that the actions of the “flesh”—the “self” Jesus told us to deny—are any behaviors, intentions, or attitudes that go against the desires of the Spirit (Galatians 5:19-24). It’s important that we prayerfully quiet ourselves before the Lord, hit the refresh button on the browsers of our hearts, and surrender all we do to Him daily. When we know the goodness of the Lord and the fullness of life found in Him, those daily sacrifices of our will become a joy to us. As we deny ourselves and follow Him, the Spirit fills us with love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control (verses 22-23).

When we find our identities in Jesus, we are no longer bound or burdened by anything else. Being a slave to Christ paradoxically brings the greatest amount of freedom. As we lose ourselves in Him, we will find a deeper sense of reason and purpose. 

Loneliness and painful burdens can exist on both sides of your wedding vows, but when you and your spouse tackle life as a team, there is a sense of community and the reassurance of having someone in your corner. We believe this indivisibility can only come when you’re first and foremost connected with the Father. Out of the overflow of your relationship with Him, you will be able to walk in unison with each other.