Freedom for Ladies: A Journey to Freedom in ChristChikamu

Forgiveness

My story has been filled with many opportunities to offer forgiveness to various family members, including my husband of 37 years. Forgiveness has changed our marriage for the better.

Another woman in one of my freedom classes, Crystal, had gone to Columbine High School and was in the library when the shooter began his rampage. Years later, when she came to my class on forgiveness, she said that even though God had helped her forgive the shooter, she didn’t feel she could ever forgive her mother for things that had happened during her childhood. But God changed her heart. She later told me she had been forever changed by choosing to forgive her mother. Forgiveness is a choice; it is an act of obedience to the Lord. She was set free because she chose wisely. When you choose to forgive, God is pleased. If your emotions are still struggling after you have forgiven, God will heal them over time. 

Today let’s do an exercise that will be so beneficial for you and those who have wronged you. I have seen multitudes of women set free by doing this. Please take your time. 

• Ask the Holy Spirit whom you need to forgive. Some of the people will be easy to write down. Write down your deepest emotions. Example: I have rage towards you for stealing my childhood. I have such strong emotions of hate towards my Dad or Mom for always [fill in the blank]. Keep writing out your true emotions. This part of the exercise may take a few sheets of paper. 
• After writing and maybe crying, say out loud: I choose to forgive [name]. 
• This next step may be hard; do it out of obedience. I choose to bless [name] with [e.g. freedom, meeting Jesus]. As you are obedient to the Word, God will begin to free you from the deep pain and emotions. It may take a while for your emotions to settle down, but because of your obedience to forgive, you will feel the release in time.
• If you have a shredder, shred the papers. It feels amazing. If you don’t have a shredder, burn them outside in a safe place.

Pray:

Lord, I am struggling to forgive [name]. They hurt me deeply and I still feel pain as I try this exercise. Help me choose to forgive [name]. 

Lord, I choose to forgive [name]. Forgive me for the anger and hatred I have had toward [name]. Please forgive me for holding on to unforgiveness. I bless [name] with Your love.

Be Still:

Father, please help me choose to keep short accounts with all the people who have hurt me. Please let forgiveness become a natural part of who I am. Give me opportunities to bless the ones who have hurt me. If the people I have forgiven keep hurting me, show me how to set biblical boundaries.

(If you are in an abusive relationship, please seek help. Find someone safe to talk to.)