Body ImageChikamu

Can I Overcome My Food Guilt? Take My Emotional-Eating Quiz

I sat alone and tormented on the couch at home, weighed down by guilt. Feeling defeated by how incapable I was of escaping my pattern of compulsive and emotional eating, I noticed my thoughts turning toward a vague idea of leaving the mental mess behind by giving up on life entirely. I think I need some help, the wiser part of me quietly suggested.

My troubled relationship with food began around age 12. As a teen, I laid a piece of paper outside the kitchen to remind me to pray before entering. That didn’t help. At times as a newlywed, I wrote down everything I ate and showed it to someone else for accountability. It only made me feel more trapped. But since I was never anorexic nor bulimic, nor much overweight, and didn’t diet, I didn’t fall into a category that I saw others getting help for.

I ate sweet foods in secret. I would eat out of sight from my children. I would go out on an errand and buy a treat just for myself so that no one would know. But I knew what I was doing wasn’t right, and the food didn’t make me feel better—I felt worse. I didn’t feel in control of what I was doing. My years of emotional eating left me guilt-ridden, dissatisfied, and isolated.

I had prayed about my problem for what seemed like a lifetime, but that day on the couch I finally surrendered to the call to get actual help from a professional. God, who had been waiting for that moment, tenderly led me to a biblically-based counselor who specialized in eating disorders, and she graciously, kindly, and gently led me out into the light. She helped me recognize and release a lot of distorted thinking patterns I had going on.

Do you struggle with your relationship with food? Ask yourself these questions to see if you might be dealing with emotional eating or a food guilt cycle.

1. Do you turn to food as your primary resource when you’re unhappy?

2. Do you hide what you’re eating from others?

3. Do you feel guilt after eating certain foods, even in moderation?

4. Does your eating feel compulsive? Do you feel out of control with your eating patterns?

If you find you’re answering “yes” to any of these, then maybe it’s time to take a step toward freedom from disordered thoughts about food. Beyond telling God the truth and asking Him for help, is it time to tell a trustworthy friend how you’re really feeling and what you’re doing to cope? To ask for prayer? To visit a counselor? Let me tell you, it’s 100 percent worth it. The freedom on the other side of my six months of counseling is breathtaking. It’s a completely different life once you turn the corner. Come into freedom and joy with me.

—Katherine