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Engagement

How much time do you spend with your children?

Your answer will likely depend on a variety of factors such as their age, whether or not you homeschool, your work schedule, and whether your children still live with you. 

Yet regardless of the actual number of hours spent in the same room, what really matters is how much time is spent engaging with your child one-on-one. Parenting takes more than just proximity; it takes purposeful engagement. 

In Deuteronomy 6:6-9 we see a parent that is purposefully engaged. The beauty of it is that it is not asking us to add another task to our already crowded to-do lists. Instead, it encourages us to take advantage of the natural moments that we should already experience in our homes. 

When you sit in your house: Take advantage of the natural opportunities that occur at mealtime. Put the cell phones away, look each other in the eyes, and talk. Every family faces difficult situations—troubles with kids at school or maybe a news tragedy close to home. Find ways to relate those circumstances with biblical truths.

When you walk by the way: How many hours a week do you spend driving your kids around? Turn down the music, take away the tablets, and take advantage of your captive audience. 

When you lie down: The combination of tiredness and the general feelings of security associated with being in bed under the covers makes many kids more willing to talk at bedtime. Take advantage of these moments as long as you can. But keep in mind, consistency is key. You won’t know when your kid will be ready to talk to you, but if you consistently make yourself available, you’ll be there when the moment comes.

When you rise: You can easily set the tone for the day with a simple prayer over your children in the morning, for example, “Lord, thank You for giving us this day, help us to live it for You. Amen”

We are often so overwhelmed with responsibilities that we can feel as though we have very little energy left after work to engage. Often, all we long for is a moment of quiet. So instead of engaging, we retreat and leave our kids to entertain themselves with their screen of choice.

God is not asking us to add another task to our list. He’s asking that we include Him in the things that we are already doing. When we do, we realize we already have all the time we need.

Pray: Lord, please help me to make the most of the time that I spend with my kids. Help us to turn away from screens and turn toward each other. 

For more help read, “10 Ideas: Creating Quality Time With Your Kids” or “How to Build a Relationship With Your Stepchild” on FamilyLife.com.