Get a GripSample

#3 Cleansing the temple

Jed was a very large man from Texas. He came to my office because of several behaviors that were out of control in his life. As we walked through the process described in this book, Jed realized he had a big issue he had to deal with to successfully get a grip on his behaviors. Jed had to face the neglect and abuse he received regularly from his mother. Every time he would visit his mother on holidays he would get all knotted up and would feel full of rage toward his wife and family afterward. Jed did the cleansing the temple exercise in my office. A short time later, after being home for a few days at Thanksgiving, Jed realized that he didn't have the same knotted-up feelings, nor did he get mad at his wife or family on the way home.

Regardless of the past, healing can take place. It can be hard and requires some patience but the results are nothing short of marvelous. I call this process “Cleansing the Temple”. As a Psychologist, I have seen thousands of clients do this exercise and feel relieved of pain, trauma, guilt, and anger by doing this exercise. Sometimes our body holds onto anger and this exercise allows us to release it. Before we begin I suggest reading John 2:13-22, as this exercise is based on the account of Jesus clearing out the temple. It lays the necessary groundwork for an understanding of what this exercise is about.

Application:

1) Write an anger letter

Write a letter to the person who hurt you, but don’t send it. Don’t hold back with your words either, be honest with what you are feeling. Ephesians 4:31 says: Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice.

2) Warm up your body

Grab something easy to hold such as a padded baseball bat or tennis racket. Warm up by hitting a mattress or pillow in increasingly harder strikes. Remember this is just to stretch and prepare, not hurt yourself. Say the word “no” with each hit, matching the intensity of each strike.

3) Read your letter aloud

Address the person as if they are there in the room with you. Make sure you are alone during this process.

4) Engage your anger physically and verbally

Hit the bed or pillow and let the other person “have it.” Release the infection that has been plaguing you. There are no limits to what you can say to your offender during this exercise. This can last 15 minutes to an hour, but don’t overdo it. Your body will tell you when you are done.