How to Cope With DivorceSample

Power of Prayer

During the divorce process, a few of the mistresses began to antagonize me on social media. I tried to avoid seeing posts, but that didn't help much. I quickly learned that God would save me, but I had to make some decisions to protect my mental state. I believe God, in His good grace, gives us all the capacity to endure our trials. Still, sometimes, we add more to our lives by watching social media posts, engaging in slanderous conversations, and attempting to keep tabs on our spouses. The latter was my biggest struggle. My ex-husband and I lived together until after our divorce was final, so we were cordial for the most part. There were difficult days when we would argue for long periods, but we both saw that arguing was not fruitful. Plus, it added stress to our children's lives.

I started coping early on with the reality of our divorce by not coping. Both of us hid our divorce from most of those whom we loved. I would spend hours on end scrolling social media, immersing myself in church and religious activities, and sleeping. I was so heartbroken as I was grieving my daughter and divorce simultaneously. I understand now why some choose other vices to numb their pain because it's harrowing when you walk through difficult seasons as a Christian; I couldn't imagine this weight of pain on someone who doesn't know Jesus Christ as Savior. He truly is our burden bearer. It was taxing, enduring the bold taunts of the other women, but I wanted so desperately to honor God.

This went on for quite some time, and I began to realize whatever I gave attention to, the enemy would use against me. If I continued to resist the devil and all his antics, he would have to flee, and with him would go the power that the antagonist worked to have over my family and me. I would pray fervently that God would help me forgive them and that He would show mercy for their actions. The more I prayed, the more compassion I felt for everyone involved. Though I knew this situation involved their choices, I also knew that the enemy was at work too. With much prayer, I could finally forgive, but this process took years.

In Hannah's story, one of her coping mechanisms was to turn away her plate; no, she wasn't fasting, crying, and praying. Prayer is what I would like to focus on today.

Interestingly, most don't pray when they are broken, but throughout scripture, we see stories of prayer being the very thing one did when faced with distress. In Jesus' life, while in the garden of Gethsemane, the Bible says He prayed until droplets of blood fell from his forehead. That's intense praying, right? When you are walking through a divorce, praying as if your life depends on it is crucial because it does.

First, I would advise you to pray that God would turn the heart of the unfaithful spouse to God and save the marriage. When that's no longer an option, I encourage you to pray fervently for the wisdom to cope with grace. You must treat every moment delicately, entrusting yourself to the power of God. God is the only one who can give you the peace you need while navigating this divorce.

So often, we talk more to our friends, counselors, and even others in our community than we speak with God. I find it interesting that the disciples walked with Jesus for three years, and out of all the disciplines they saw, the miracles, His power to calm storms, and His Healing work of those who were sick or demon-possessed, the one thing they asked was "teach me to pray."

Prayer is a strategic plan that helps you sort through your thoughts, emotions, fears, realities, and much more. Prayer is the one action that shows your dependence on God. It's you lifting up all the broken pieces of your life in surrender and praying, "Lord, here it is, do what you will with it." This is how you heal, by acknowledging your pain and then submitting it to God in prayer.

Practical tip. Get a journal, write out everything you are afraid of, and find Bible verses to combat the fears. There is a biblical truth for every lie the enemy will attempt to feed you.

Be Encouraged.