Exploring Sexual IntegritySample

Show Me Your Friends

Achieving sexual integrity is an ongoing process that requires us to reach for Him who has wondrously reached out for us, even when we least deserve it. To lean into God, we have to remove the external voices that lead to corruption and incompleteness.

2 Corinthians 10:5 tells us to “demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God.” Sexual integrity begins with our thoughts and what we choose to ponder. Those unwelcome thoughts are planted by the enemy who seeks to destroy us (John 10:10); however, many times the enemy does his work through people and things that influence our lives: friends, artists, social media icons, etc.

Amnon, the son of David, fell in love with his half-sister, Tamar. The Bible tells us his lust for her was so powerful he became obsessed (2 Samuel 13:1-22). Amnon had a trusted adviser to whom he later told his secret. His adviser counseled him to pretend to be ill and trick Tamar into bringing him food in bed. This way, Amnon could have his way with her and fulfill his lustful desires against her will! I always wonder if the outcome would have been different, had Amnon been influenced by his adviser to fight against his deviant sexual nature.

God’s word gives us a way to filter our thoughts which lead to actions. Friends, we have the tools and authority we need to demolish a notion before we entertain it, and here’s how:

Are your thoughts true, noble, right, pure, lovely, admirable, excellent, or praiseworthy? (Philippians 4:8). Moreover, does what you are watching or listening to pass this test?

Over the years, the friends and “advisers” I’ve chosen have impacted me greatly. For many years, I gravitated to friends who promoted promiscuity, dirty jokes, and everything contrary to God’s word. It is not surprising that my lifestyle followed suit.

Today, my friends are those who pray for me, keep me accountable, and propel me to a higher calling. I would be naive to think that I am strong enough to hang around the same old circles while trying to live a life of sexual integrity. You cannot pour new wine into old wineskins! (Matthew 9:17)

Is there someone in your life who continues to heavily influence you into sexual sin? Perhaps you are still entangled in some old habits. The Bible says when we receive new life in Jesus, the new creation has come: the old has gone, the new is here (2 Corinthians 5:17). This means a new mind, a new focus, and yes, new friends.

He has wrapped us with a robe of righteousness (Isaiah 61:10), but we must be willing to relinquish the old garments. The bad memories, the old friends that led us astray, our social status, and the old habits that cause shame, are examples of the old man.