The Sky’s the Limit, Innit? Learning to Thrive Within Your LimitsSample

Lamenting Our Limits

Have the expectations of what you thought your life would look like been met? I grew up expecting I’d be a mum to two birth children. There's no particular reason for that, it’s just what I assumed my family would look like. As it turns out I’m mum to one child – a beautiful and cheeky little girl who has Down Syndrome, and I became a mum through adoption. My daughter is the most wonderful gift – the daughter of my dreams. We didn’t struggle to conceive; we just knew God was leading us to adopt rather than have birth children. I’m extremely thankful for God’s plot twist and that this was my route to motherhood.

When our daughter was two, we felt we could do more so we applied to be foster carers. We actively did respite foster care for eighteen months. This was the way I expected our family would eventually grow to include two children. However, in a nutshell, though fostering was a positive experience, we recognized that caring for two children pushed us beyond our collective limits and capacity as a family. Eventually, we had to resign as foster carers. This was utterly devastating for me. I had to grieve the loss of a dream and readjust the expectations that I’d grown up with, that I’d be a mum to two children. I went through a time of feeling very confused, discouraged, and angry with God. I wanted to make more of a difference to children in care. I wrestled with why God had given me what I felt was such a rubbish level of capacity compared to others I know who have three, four, and five children plus have jobs and hobbies (and even rear chickens in some cases). And to top it off, they even manage to be nice people! I didn’t rush to resolve this time of lamenting my limits. I took time to grieve, come to terms with it, and ask God the difficult questions.

Reflection

Are there limits in your life that you need to lament?

Did you hope to serve God in a particular way and now realize you can’t do so?

The Bible says there is a time to weep and mourn – do you need to do so in any area of your limited life?